Pacquiao diet contest winners yield few clues you can use to lose weight

As you contemplate that perfectly reasonable New Year’s resolution to lose 30 pounds in 2009, you would be crazy to ask boxing people how to do it. Even Manny Pacquiao, who upset the larger Oscar De La Hoya last month, has only confused issues of weight management in boxing.

First, that fight was an exception to, not a refutation of,  the rule that moving up in weight is rarely desirable. Two, it is still wrongly believed that Pacquiao fattened up nearly 15 percent in a matter of weeks to meet De La Hoya as a welterweight. In fact, Pacquiao merely lost less weight than usual to beat De La Hoya, who presumably lost about 15 percent.

But they did lose weight, you’re saying. And Pacquiao scattered $74,000 among his entourage after staging a two-week diet contest. Might their methods help you lose? Probably not. You may think boxing people know more about weight management than the average high school wrestler, but nothing about this fall’s dietary derby proved that.

First, De La Hoya looked less hearty than usual, so don’t rush out to buy kangaroo and ostrich steaks.

Second, economists might say Pacquiao is getting the most ironic of diminishing returns on his investment.

One of the reward winners, Winchell Campos, won’t say how he lost 16 pounds in 13 days to earn $2,000, but he will say he has fully enjoyed celebrating the holidays and Pacquiao’s victory and that he is beefing up for the next contest. “I’m trying to gain some so I can lose more next time,” Campos said. Worse, the official Pacquiao diet contest winner was Alex Ariza, who ate only apples and drank protein shakes to lose 20 pounds for $3,000 plus a $10,000 bonus. Ariza is Pacquiao’s fitness guru!

So we got your advice right here, you Turtle-lookalikes out there. Friends say my wife and I, who spend an hour at the farmers market every Sunday, are the poster children for healthful eating, although they haven’t tallied my sugar and fat intake. The missus even lost 10 pounds recently, and it’s pretty difficult to refrain from chasing her around the house, so those pounds may stay off.

Alas, we can’t recommend her methodology, which involves a layoff and stress. If layoffs and stress haven’t been getting you similar results, try to cut out sugared soda and drink a half gallon of water a day; restrict your carbohydrate intake from mid-afternoon on; avoid processed foods, especially anything “meatnormous”; eat a big mess of the strongest-tasting vegetables you can stand at dinner; and exercise strenuously for just 20 minutes a day. This is a regimen that dissolved the welterweight champion’s love handles a few years back.

My methods are under fire, too. I’m a mite underweight at the moment, but please don’t call me a lightweight. I just need to maintain or gain slightly, sort of the way Pacquiao did training for  De La Hoya. What sort of concoctions and supplements did Pacquiao have to endure to come in at the heaviest weight of his career?

Ariza said there wasn’t much to it, for a change, since Pacquiao usually loses 20 pounds for a fight. Ariza told writer Doug Fischer the fighter merely was eating a little extra protein, so I’ll try that. As for Pacquiao’s weight-gaining aesthetics, he staged an eating contest on Thanksgiving, in the midst of the diet contest, giving $200 apiece to eight dudes who ate three or four plates’ worth of rice, chicken adobo, sweet and sour fish and beef stew.

Wait a minute. Isn’t that the James Toney Diet?

Here are better diet and nutrition hints from our Nutrition Examiner.