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Relationships in the news: John Travolta's son Jett died while on vacation
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People Magazine and TMZ released a story today reporting that John Travolta and Kelly Preston's 16-year-old son Jett was found unconscious in the bathroom of the family's vacation home in the Bahamas. In a statement issued to the press by Travolta's rep, the teen was taken to the hospital and pronounced dead. Jett is believed to have hit his head on the bathtub. The family will be waiting for the exact cause of death after an autopsy is performed. It has been reported that Jett had a seizure disorder and Kawasaki Disease,
which is a disease that happens in childhood and can cause heart problems. The Travolta's also have a daughter Ella Bleu, 8.
Regardless of the cause of death, or the age of the child, this is a devastating loss and an overwhelming experience for a parent. Parents may blame themselves regardless of how unrealistic or irrational it may seem to outsiders. Parents also loose the hopes and dreams for their child and a vital part of their own identity.
Common grief reactions are:
- A sense of disbelief and numbness.
- The overwhelming urge to bring the person back.
- Intrusive thoughts and flooding memories.
- A sense of disorganization and sadness.
- Children who experience grief tend to have their feelings come and go in spikes. They may become clingy one minute and then want to play the next. Children may also emotionally regress for a period of time.
Helpful things for parents:
- Use grief counseling for education and emotional support. Most parents report needing this help around six months when family and friends begin to go back to their lives, until then many parents use their own supportive network.
- Compassionate Friends is a peer support group for parents.
- Even if you did not use Hospice Services, the Hospice Foundation of America can help locate bereavement services in your area.
Compassion Books, not associated with Compassionate Friends, is a wonderful resource for books on grief. They have an excellent selection of children's books. My personal favorite is "When Dinosaurs Die," because it covers a wide variety of causes of death and personal traditions and beliefs.
For the Travolta family, and all families who have lost a child, wishing you peace and comfort at this difficult time.
For more info about relationships, behavior and parenting visit me @: messylife.typepad.com/my_weblog/
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