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When your movie choices become the argument
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It is one of the oldest and greatest battles that occurs continually and can be seen in the home of the couple, outside of the movie theater, and/or in the local movie rental store: what film can we agree on seeing together. Note: I did not say, 'which film do we WANT to see,' because nine times out of ten, someone is not watching a film that he or she had any real desire to see in the first place. There are new films released practically every other week. Sixty years ago, it was unheard of for as many films to be released in one month as there are now. I mean think about it, in the past two months alone there has been: "Ice Age 3: Dawn of the Dinosaurs," "Year One," "Land of the Lost," "The Proposal," "Obsessed," "Drag Me to Hell," "Transformers 2," "Star Trek," "Wolverine," and the "Hangover" to name merely a few. With all of the various choices out there provided to us by the great movie moguls out there trying to make more money than the other guy, it can make the decision quite difficult for some couples. In my own personal experience, going to the movies or renting a movie has provided what my husband and I call the "Great Movie Debate" followed immediately by the "Great Movie Compromise/Deal/Agreement."
Some of you may be saying, "Please, my _____ and I never fight over movies. S/he always lets me pick"...or vice versa. Great! Congratulations! Please email me your secret!
Meanwhile, the rest of us are still facing the debate and hopefully, quickly reached, deal. Over the years, my husband and I have found ourselves in this debate many, many times over. Being huge movie buffs, we have over a 1000 DVDs at our home, and yet we still find the time for the debate, whether we're at home watching a film or going to see something new in the theaters. Granted, that decision usually surrounds which theater is showing what. But back to our subject. The Great Movie Debate started for us when my husband and I were dating and for our first anniversary, he took me to see "Saw 2." Now, being the complete chicken that I am, I do not like the horror film genre, especially the psychological stuff that somebody could really do to someone else, like the "Saw" films. Hello! Somebody had to think this stuff up people, and personally, I don't want to meet that person. Back to the point, he came up to me with the tickets, and I was so mad that for our anniversary, supposed to be romantic, was going to be covered in blood and gore for the night. Great. Can you tell how ecstatic I was over the date at this point? By the end of the film, I was shaking so hard and violently that M felt really bad about taking me to see the film. He said he needed to run by the local Wal-Mart and pick something up. Little did I know, he ran in to buy me the funny chick flick "Bewitched," so that we could watch it at his apartment to make up for the disturbing film we had seen earlier.
Since this moment in history, M and I have always had the Great Movie Debate if it's going to be just the two of us. I usually want to see the latest romantic comedy and he usually wants to see whatever film has people getting their heads shot off. This leads to about a 5 to 20 minute debate outside the movie theater or in the rental store drawing the attention of onlookers. There are numerous ways we come to solve this debate. We either: a) agree to see one now and the other later, b) agree to see the romantic comedy now (I mention how he dragged me to see "Saw 2" on our anniversary--this usually doesn't work and it's very rare that we do option B), c) we see some completely random comedy movie that literally doesn't seem to have a point ("Superbad," "Year One") not to name names or anything, or d) we go home and watch "House" because we know we can always agree to watch that.
While all of the options have various outcomes, we do usually end up agreeing pretty quickly, unless he is adamant that he wants to see some horrible film. Although I will say, it was my choice to see "The Exorcism of Emily Rose," I think I might have been drinking that night...
The point of this article is that we all have had the arguments over which movie to see based on either actor, genre, or mood, but it's how we handle it that can make the Great Movie Debate into a true heated battle with thrown popcorn and everything. Here are a couple of ways to help make the decision/compromise a little bit easier.
1) Flip a coin. Whoever wins gets to pick the movie---both sides should be nice no matter who wins and try to consider the other's feelings.
2) Make an immediate date for the next night to see the other film.
3) Come up with a system: rotate turns picking the movie, rotate different genre styles of films.
4) All else fails: see a cartoon: "Up," "Ice Age 3," "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs." Hey, don't judge me. M took me to see "Up" for my birthday this year. I saw "Ice Age 3" with my sister last night, and I'm really looking forward to "Cloudy." Those films are not just for children!
Remember: it's not supposed to be about what movie you see, but sometimes...it just is.
For more information, see the Examiner.com
Questions? Comments? Email Laura at relationships.lauramoran@gmail.com
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