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The annual selection of Wazoo jokes
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Welcome to Apple Cup week and it is time to insult our brothers and sisters across the state who weren't smart enough to qualify to attend college at the UW. I think it is just magical that the two worst teams in all of college football have the honor of squaring off in the Apple (Toilet) Cup this coming Saturday.
Q: How do you neuter a Cougar?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw!
Q: What do Cougar Football players always get on their final exams?
A: Drool.
Q: What do you call a cougar golfing with an IQ of 120?
A: A foursome!
Q: Why are a tornado and a cougar divorce similiar?
A: You know someone is going to lose a house trailer!
Q: What does a Cougar say to a Husky at McDonald's?
A: "May I take your order, sir?"
Q: What's the biggest lie told in Pullman?
A: "I was just helping that sheep over the fence."
Q: What's the number one pickup line used for picking up WAZZU chicks?
A: "Hey, nice tooth!"
Q: What do Cougar cheerleaders and Cougar quarterbacks have in common?
A: They're always on their backs.
Q: How do you keep cougars out of your yard?
A: Put up goalposts.
Q: What has 20 legs and 3 teeth?
A: The first row of fans at Martin Stadium.
Q: How do you keep a Cougar from drinking too much?
A: Slam the toilet on his head.
A Coug riddle: If two Cougs get married in Pullman and then move to Seattle, are they still brother and sister?
Bubba had been attending WSU for six years and still did not have enough credits to graduate. At the commencement ceremony, the entire student body began chanting, "Let Bubba graduate, Let Bubba graduate!" The Pullman president decided that if Budda could answer a one-question exam, he would graduate. The president said, "You have one chance, Bubba, what is 9x9"? Budda beamed and blurted out 81. A stunned silence followed. Then the whole crowd yelled, "Give him another chance! Give him another chance!"
Last night there was a fire at the WSU library. They lost 20 books to the flames. The worst part was that 15 of them hadn't been colored in yet!
Quotes
"Attending WAZZU is great preparation for real life. It teaches you not to expect too much."
- Don James
"Jesus was actually supposed to be born in Pullman, rather than Bethlehem. But they couldn't find three wise men and a virgin."
- Unknown
You heard of the Cougar who broke his leg raking leaves?
He fell out of a tree....
Apple cup humor from a Cougar's point of view.
