RSS
Home
The Bachelorette Spoilers – What should we believe? Let's break it down.
Print
Email
RSS
Subscribe
Most people tune into the Bachelorette for the same reason – it’s pure entertainment. Say what you will about this show, but once you watch it, you’ll come back for more. Real critics say this show is mindless (well, duh) and scripted (probably a little), heavily edited (no kidding), and watching it will actually make you dumber (hey, I resent that). None of it matters, because the bottom line is that it’s fun to watch. However, most people tune in, watch it, and go to bed. And then there are the rest of us…
We don’t just watch this show. We read about it online. We read articles about the Bachelorette and her suitors in magazines. We search the internet for spoilers. We hit up websites and participate in chats that speculate who will be kicked off next. We hear all the rumors and discuss them endlessly with our Bachelorette friends. It is insane and slightly pathetic, yet awesome, intriguing and oh, so much fun.
Keeping up with the Jillian drama in this season of the Bachelorette has been exhausting. I’ve read a zillion things about the show this season - Spoilers, recaps, rumors, previews, speculation, interviews and anything else you can imagine. Hell, I’ve written some of them. So are you tired of scouring the internet for the real scoop on what will happen in this season of the Bachelorette? Me too. Here’s what I’ve done to make this easier on you. No more searching the internet and no more wasting your precious hours at the office chatting with co-workers, speculating about what rumors are true. Below are the most common things I’ve read or heard about this show and whether they’re true or not. Disclaimer: I have absolutely no idea what I’m talking about. This column today is my opinion, so if you disagree, you’re probably right.
Rumor: Rage David was paid by the Bachelorette folks to appear on the show.
Me: No way. There is no way David is a normal dude. There is no actor in Hollywood half as talented as you would need to be to play “David” and be believable. He’s so insane, it has to be real.
.jpg) |
Stephen: "I'm a catch because I'm a lawyer". When eliminated he said, "Maybe Jillian doesn't like awesome guys." Photo courtesy of ABC |
Rumor: Other guys have also been paid $50,000 to appear on the show, and in exchange, they’re guaranteed a spot in the final four.
Me: Two problems with this: 1) Why would you have to pay anyone to be on this show? The guys get to be on TV, take kick ass dates to exotic places for free and they might even get to roll around naked with hot Jillian. You don’t need $50,000 to convince some financial analyst from Akron to participate. 2) If the Bachelorette people wanted to craft a show worth watching, Jillian’s final four would be Rage David, Stephen, (The lawyer from New York who said, “I’m a catch because I’m a lawyer”), Kyle (The dork who shopped only in thrift stores), and Simon (the English soccer coach who needed subtitles even though he spoke English). Now THAT would be money well spent. There’s no way ABC would have paid for Michael, Kiptyn, Reid, Wes or Jesse to be in the final four because they aren’t all that interesting. (They’re a little interesting, don’t get me wrong…but they’re not Rage David-level of interesting). By the way, our host, Chris Harrison, does a good job of de-bunking this rumor in his blog.
Rumor: Ed comes back
Me: Totally true. If you search for it, there is so much evidence that this happens, it isn’t even debatable. I’d be shocked if he didn’t come back. Something tells me that he doesn’t win though, which sucks. Ed is definitely a stand-up guy and a great catch, but I still wonder if he’s the type of guy Jillian wants naked on top of her.
.jpg) |
When does Ed come back? Photo courtesy of ABC |
Rumor: Kiptyn is actually gay, and he was also paid to be on the show.
Me: Why in God’s name would ABC pay a gay guy to be on the show? How is it good TV to watch a chick fall in love with a gay guy? It does explain the incredibly awkward kissing though.
Rumor: Wes actually is a dirtbag.
Me: This is true. I wrote it two weeks ago and it’s still true. I stand by this one.
Rumor: Jillian and the guy she chooses actually end up getting married!
Me: Please, people, have we not seen this show before? The odds are not good. There’s no way one of these shows actually ends the way it’s supposed to. When Trista and Ryan are what you’re striving for, that’s a bad sign.
Rumor: When Jake comes back to tell Jillian that Wes has a girlfriend, she ends up dumping Wes on the spot and taking Jake back.
Me: I’m sure there are a lot of Jake fans out there, and enough Wes-haters out there, who wish this would be true, but it’s not happening. Jake does comes back, but there is no way Jillian is ready to dump Wes. Besides that, she doesn’t like Jake. I know, he’s the perfect catch, but to her, he’s not enough of a man. He would always want to use the term “making love” and he’d want to talk about their feelings all the time. He’s just not Jillian’s cup of tea.
.jpg) |
Does Michael win it all? Photo courtesy of ABC |
Rumor: Jillian takes a basic grammar lesson and learns to speak correctly.
Me: Nope. We have a few more weeks left of “Me and Jake” and “Wes and me”.
Rumor: Michael wins
Me: Maybe. There’s so much drama built around Ed, Wes and even Jake, that ABC could be trying to fly Michael under the radar. She ends up with the break dancer? I’m going to say this one might actually be true.
Tune into the Bachelorette tonight when Jillian visits five hometowns. The previews show Jake returning and letting the “Wes girlfriend” cat out of the bag. We also see a familiar face returning to the rose ceremony…Is this finally Ed’s comeback?
For a recap of last week's episode, click here!
Related Articles:
Comments
