Phish Renamed to Sea Kitten?

June 22, 7:04 AMMusic Festivals ExaminerRain Blanken

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Original Photo by Joe Mad/Remixed by Rain

Ashley Byrne, a PETA senior campaigner based in Washington, D.C., remarks that, “hooking a fish through the mouth and dragging it out of the water is really the same as hooking a dog through the mouth and dragging him behind your car.”

Of course, if you named that yummy tilapia 'Scruffy', then no one would dare slap it on a plate, right? This is the line of thinking that lead PETA to request that the band Phish change its name to the more snuggly alternative: 'Sea Kitten'.

The would-be Sea Kittens were requested to undergo the cuddly identity crisis during their scheduled Wisconsin shows to accomplish what Byrne describes as an 'image overhaul' for her finned friends. “They don’t receive the sympathy of the more cuddly animals. We thought that by re-branding fish as sea kittens, they might receive the compassion they deserve.”

Essentially, Byrne is saying that since Mother Nature beat guppies in the face with an ugly stick, a popular U.S. jam band should do the trick to dupe stupid hippies into believing fish are cute.

It is not only incredulous to think that Phish would be so flippant as to undergo a name change at the hysterical whims of PETA, but shouldn't Phish fans in general be insulted at the level of intelligence with which PETA has labeled them? I can just imagine the deli isle full of newly-converted 'Sea Kitten' fans who have taken on the cause simply because a certain band said so. Apparently PETA has no qualms about turning humans into sheep. At press, Phish has not yet commented or made any changes to the band name; Sea Kitten, Cat Fish or otherwise.

Of course, since Phish has an audience that is already hyper-aware of veganism and vegetarianism, isn't PETA just uselessly preaching to the choir? Yes, exactly just how much more can we get the neo-hippy subculture to become aware of animal rights? Talk about shooting fish in a barrel.