Must parents of autistic kids become advocates and activists at church?

June 9, 11:06 AMInformal Education ExaminerLisa Jo Rudy

Previous Next

8 comments Print Email RSS Subscribe

Subscribe

Get alerts when there is a new article from the Informal Education Examiner. Read Examiner.com's terms of use.

Email Address   Include other special offers from Examiner.com Terms of Use

Do you fight to have your child included at church?

I'm writing a book "Autism Out of the Box." The focus is on providing parents with the tools they need to help their child or teen with autism out of the "box" of school and therapists' offices, and into the wide world.

One chapter of the book will deal specifically with kids, autism, and religious settings (church, synagogue).

In conversation with a Catholic Director of Religious Education, I said - really in passing - "well, I suppose if a religious educator tells you that he simply can't accept your child with special needs, you should look for another spiritual home."

The response surprised me.

"Oh, no," she said.  "after all, if you don't blaze a trail at that church, what will happen to the next family that comes along?  You should introduce that church to the available resources, and get in touch with the disabilities program at the diocese level.  You should really stay, and educate the congregation."

"But..." I sputtered, "...isn't a religious home supposed to be a place where you and your child feel welcome?  Is it really reasonable to expect a family to fight the good fight so that others might benefit - while they themselves have to stare down a disapproving congregation?"

In the end, we agreed to disagree. 

But honestly, this is one of the major reasons we left the school district and decided to homeschool. 

Yes, there are individual parents here and there for whom constant battle is an energizing and positive experience.  And there are moms and dads who feel that it's their responsibility to educate and change each institution they encounter.

For me, though, the challenge of raising my child, creating new inclusive programs, and discovering those people and resources who want to include kids on the spectrum is more than enough.  A religious setting, to me, is a respite - not an opportunity for battle.    I have no need to reflect and pray at the center of a swarm of angry bees!

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER!