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Kanye West is new self-appointed King of Pop
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In a move typical of the modest and understated Kanye West, he has deigned himself the new King Of Pop. The always demure and self-deprecating reluctantly stepped up to the position no one asked him to fill. He humbly states, "There's no one who can match me in sales and in respect (one assumes he means self-respect) so it only makes sense for me to take over Michael's crown and become the new King of Pop." He added, "First there was Elvis, then there was Michael, now in the 21st century it's Kanye's time to rule."
He then presumably ripped the King of Pop scepter from Michael's bony hands and waited for his procession to his grand, tacky castle. The coronation ceremony is yet to be announced.
This is awesome on multiple levels. First, it has Kanye referring to himself in third person, which is always the greatest sign of douchery. Second, it is more a military coupe than democratic decision, which is actually very typical of monarchy. Screw what the people think! King Henry Kanye iV answers to no one! Third, no offense to the massive talent Elvis and Michael possessed, would you really want to inherit that legacy? They didn't do so well, personal-life-wise.
Can't wait for the Shakespearean play praising his rise to power and his heroic decisions in battle. Unless it plays off more like Richard III.
UPDATE: This turned out to be fake interview. The throne is still up for grabs.
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