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Top 10 reasons to criminalize homeschooling

March 1, 8:46 PMEducation ExaminerDonna Gundle-Krieg
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This spoof below about "homeschooling versus public schooling" was first posted in November when I was writing for the Detroit Examiner market.

Since then, the memo has been one of the most popular and controversial postings on my website. Recently,  someone asked if I would repost it on the National Examiner page.
 
This memo has circulated among the home schooling community many times over the years, and always causes heated debates. I have never been able to find out who originally authored this. If anyone knows, please let me know!
 
Some say that this was written as a serious piece by someone from the teachers' union.  Others claim that the author was a homeschooler writing a sarcastic piece to try to combat the constant and undeserved criticism that homeschoolers receive.

 
Memo: Top 10 Reasons to Criminalize Homeschooling

 
In an effort to increase the public drumbeat for criminalizing homeschooling, a memo has been distributed containing the top 10 reasons why public schooling is better than homeschooling. Here is an excerpt from that memo:

Most parents were educated in the under funded public school system, and so are not smart enough to homeschool their own children.

Children who receive one-on-one homeschooling will learn more than others, giving them an unfair advantage in the marketplace. This is undemocratic.

How can children learn to defend themselves unless they have to fight off bullies on a daily basis?

Ridicule from other children is important to the socialization process.

Children in public schools can get more practice "Just Saying No" to drugs, cigarettes and alcohol.

Fluorescent lighting may have significant health benefits.

Publicly asking permission to go to the bathroom teaches young people their place in society.

The fashion industry depends upon the peer pressure that only public schools can generate.

Public schools foster cultural literacy, passing on important traditions like the singing of "Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin laid an egg..."

Homeschooled children may not learn important office career skills, like how to sit still for six hours straight.

Writer's note: after I posted this story, comments generated a followup posting called "Writer's Apology to Homeschoolers: I am a Homeschooler Myself!"

To see comments that readers previously posted about this memo, see “Why Public Schooling is Better Than Homeschooling.”
 
                                                                                                                                          
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