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The Texas Democrat examined
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Fig. 1 Democratis texanis
In an effort to further the science of politics, your Examiner takes a look at the Texas Democrat. A complex creature, Democrats of the Texas variety are of particular interest to political scientists and concerned Austinites alike.
Fig. 2 Range of the Texas Democrat (in blue)
History
Once a plentiful species in Texas, by 2003 Democrats were nearly hunted to extinction. Their careful comeback over the past six years has greatly affected the political ecosystem, and while certain Texas (and Kansas) school districts may disagree, we can clearly see the process of evolution in this mysterious creature.
The landscape of Texas politics has not always been this way. From Reconstruction until the 1970’s, Democrats roamed freely over the plains, hills, coasts and deserts of Texas. By the 1960’s, however, scientists began to observe certain traits in the National Democratic genus, and these characteristics – social progressivism, diversity, civil rights – began to be seen in the Texas variety. These new genetic strains elicited new voting patterns, and Democrats quickly became a rarer sight throughout the state.
While Texas Democrats were once easily recognizable to those outside the state (Lyndon Johnson, Sam Rayburn and Lloyd Bentsen for example), by 2004 most Americans could not imagine a Democrat besides the Standard New England Liberal, or democratis kennedii. Most foreigners did not even know that Democrats were indigenous to Texas.
Since then, attention to the Democratic genus on the national level has given new life to Texas Democrats, but it remains to be seen whether they can be as plentiful as they once were.
Fig. 3 Behavior of the Texas Democrat
Range & Behavior
Being pushed to extinction has greatly changed the Democrat’s range. No longer as plentiful in rural areas of north, east and west Texas, they have largely been pushed to south Texas, where they are mostly free of predators, and the urban centers of Dallas, Houston, Austin and San Antonio, though many city-dwellers still consider them a nuisance, like wild deer or raccoons.
The Texas Democrat is unique within the Democratic family. More ornery and stubborn than the Standard New England, California or Northwest Coastal variety, Democrats are much more likely to fight over territory with other predators, like Republicans and more recently, Libertarians, though Libertarians are generally considered scavengers that pick on Republican remains.
A feisty creature, years of cohabitation with Republicans have seen the mingling of certain traits. Compared to other varieties, Texas Democrats have selected traits beneficial to the Texas landscape – protection of privacy and individual freedoms and support for commerce and business, amongst others.
While fierce when confronted, Texas Democrats can be very amiable and friendly, another byproduct of Texan behavior patterns. Whether these traits will help sustain the species is unknown.
Scientists generally agree that Democrats throw the best parties. Recent research at the University of Texas confirms this.
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