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Emotional intelligence is not an oxymoron.
We all are familiar with the term I.Q. Our society touts the importance of knowing someone's I.Q. as if that is the best measure of human potential. But research is finding that our Emotional Intelligence Quotient or E.Q. can matter even more.
Our current worldview ignores the power of the engine of our human nature - our emotions. This grave omission has left our world bankrupt in more ways than the fiscal ones we are currently experiencing. Emotions have been regarded as something that weakens us, when in truth, our emotions are as indispensable to living as breathing air. And the quality of our life is directly related to our level of Emotional Intelligence. As stated in 'The Little Prince' by Antione de Saint-Expurey, "It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."
While emotions may seem intangible, they are actually part of a complex physiological system. According to Joie Seldon, emotional educator and therapist: "Emotions are a biological system (just as we have a vascular system, an endocrine system, etc.), the purpose of which is to bring us information about what is happening in our world, externally and internally, in order to prompt us to action that is optimally beneficial to our survival and well being. The problems we encounter with our feelings are not the emotions themselves, but our suppression and denial of them, of the very information they are bringing us, which causes relational problems, physical pain and ill health. The more we know about the practical purpose of emotions, the better able we are to experience and communicate them in healthy ways."
Our society places a high value on the rational, reasonable and intellectual. In failing to value emotions and listen to the profound truths they hold, we have cut off a part of our humanity, resulting in personal and societal imbalance. Surprisingly, it is the scientific community that is doing the most to support the value of emotions. With the advent of technology such as MRI, a great deal of what happens in the brain and body when we are having an emotional experience can be tracked. Neuroscience has discovered so much about the processing of emotions on a biological level that there is a new branch called Affective Neuroscience. Neuro-science has come to understand the importance of emotions on a biological level.
Emotions have a biological function with a huge psychological component. By not valuing feelings and listening to the profound truths they hold, a grave imbalance exists socially and personally. When we just try to go with the intellect we don't use the bridge of information between the tangible and the intangible. You cannot actually focus at your best and most reasonable without emotional intelligence. Without being completely aware of and in charge of feelings, you can't have social management and social awareness. It stands to reason that when we focus on the intellect while denying or repressing emotions, we cannot function at our best.
Our stoic culture has allowed us to cut off from recognizing the impact of a runaway health care system and a diminishing democracy. We are out of touch with the information emotions tell us about the ultimate meaning of what is really happening. If we repress our emotions and cannot distinguish, and take responsibility for the energy of each feeling as it comes up, we lose inherent pieces of information about what it means to be human and humane. Emotional awareness is practical in the greatest sense of the term. In the words of Carl Jung:
"Conflict engenders fire, the fire of affects and emotions, and like every other fire it has two aspects, that of combustion and that of creating light. On the one hand, emotion is the alchemical fire whose warmth brings everything into existence and whose heat burns all superfluities to ashes. But on the other hand, emotion is the moment when steel meets flint and a spark is struck forth, for emotion is the chief source of consciousness. There is no change from darkness to light or from inertia to movement without emotion."
To find out more about accessing the power of emotions in your life contact Oakland local expert Joie Seldon @ (510) 536-3335 or visit her website at www.Joieseldon.com
BIO:
Joie Seldon has been teaching an innovative and effective approach to understanding and managing emotions for the past nine years. Combining a masters degree education in Somatic Counseling Psychology with thirty years experience as a professional actor and acting teacher, she lectures and teaches workshops in Emotional Education™. She also has a private holistic counseling practice in Oakland, CA, and specializing in working with professional women and in teaching communication skills to couples. She is a member of the Screen Actors Guild, the American Federation of Television & Radio Artists and the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapy. She is also certified as a Speaking Circles® Facilitator, and hold workshops teaching presentation skills for women called Liberating Women’s Voice.
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