What if the court systems continue to put youth in prison for drug charges and lighten the sentences to probationary and community service, only to charge the parent all the necessary court fees associated with the multiple drug charges/felony charges? What if you are a parent who strives to teach your child the right way to live and the path they should take, yet they choose to go down dangerous paths that lead to destruction, prison, addiction and even death? According to MSNBC news, one mother felt that her son had not learned his lesson and took charge of her own disciplinary. She had him stand on a busy street with a sign for two hours.
Kunbi Tinouye recently published a news article titled – Mom forces teen to wear sign: ‘I lie, I steal, I sell drugs, I don’t follow the law’ on The Grio (affiliated with MSNBC.com) where a mother utilized public humiliation as a tactical disciplinary action against her wayward son. This news story comes out of Fort Wayne, Indiana and Dynesha Lax, according to the news article, described how frustrated she became with the meager sentencing the courts handed out to her wayward son:
“I decided he broke the law and they only gave him a few hours of community service so I decided that we were going to wear a sign that says you looking for attention, we’re going to get you attention” (as per quote and in reference to what she said to KLTV).
According to KLTV and the MSNBC article, Lax’s son had to stand on the street corner for two hours, and that at the age of 14 he had already acquired multiple felony charges.
This begs the question – is public humiliation appropriate in some circumstances? Concerned citizens who saw the young man called police and the police supported the mother’s decision by telling news reporters that Dynesha was well within her rights as a mother to have her child stand on the street with the sign. Granted, such a disciplinary action is unorthodox and quite unbecoming for parenting in today’s society and culture; however, it does raise this question regarding the effectiveness of public humiliation or shame punishment.
In May of 2008, news channel KETV of Omaha, Nebraska reported that a single mother had run out of ideas for appropriate punishment before she employed public humiliation. Christina Wilcox stood on the corner one Thursday evening and one son held a sign that read: “I’ll never have a girlfriend. I can’t respect my mom.” Another son’s sign read that he was a thief.
More recently, a Florida mother had her son hold up a sign that read off his poor academic progress and refusal to participate in his learning curriculum at school. This included his, then, current GPA.
In a paper published in the Cleveland State Law Review of Saint Louis University – School of Law: Chad Flanders argues that in our liberal society, we ought to seek out a more expressive form of punishment that respects the dignity of the criminal offender. He does this by examining both sides of the issue on public shaming – or more appropriately referenced, shaming punishments. True, Flanders is arguing and justifying how we can have a liberal society while maintaining dignity and respect for those who act outside of the acceptable norms of society – including those individuals who commit heinous crimes: while, at the same time, inflicting necessary punishment upon them for their criminal behavior against social norms. Within this construct of dignity and respect enters into debate of whether or not shaming punishments for criminal behavior is ethical.
Flanders also defines exactly what shaming punishment entails – the deliberate public humiliation of the offender. He then mentions a few examples as to how some forms of shaming punishments may entail. However, we must ask ourselves, are these effective disciplinary actions; especially when it is regarding the parent-child relationship?
As previously mentioned, the mother who had her son present a sign advertising his low grade point average had become the premise for a blog article by Lilly Sanovia titled – Will Public Humiliation Lead to Better Grades for Your Child?
Sanovia quickly mentions some obvious red flags – the first is that the young man was required by his single mother to stand on a sidewalk for four hours:
Putting aside the most obvious and practical question of how this child is supposed to get his homework done if he spends every day after school walking up and down the street wearing a sign for hours on end, if you’re like me, you see a bunch of steps missing from this process – a whole bunch.
Sanovia, then, mentions some of those steps she would have taken, and from what she writes, had experienced when her son went through a tough time. Yet, this is about grades, but what about those teenagers who already have a conviction record in their early teens? What of those parents who reach the end of their rope and have done all they can in their own abilities to educate their children, teach them right from wrong and the child rebels and goes out selling drugs, stealing, and committing crimes while disregarding the acceptable social norms of society?
One mom blogger published an article describing different shaming punishments and talks about them, and some of the public shaming were not just because of something kids had done wrong, one was a court sentence for a woman to stand with a sign on a sidewalk in front of the courthouse and another was of an older woman who stole from a 9 year old child.
The question remains elusive, controversial, and highly opinionated. When parents employ the tactic of public humiliation as last resort disciplinary actions, it may be the ticket to get the child to realize the seriousness of their consequences. Should parents use this? Personally, as a last resort when all else fails while informing them of the reason why they have to endure this, explaining the reality of their decisions and the consequences that follow, and to let them know one is concerned for their own safety and welfare.
Some parents may disagree and that is okay; so this is your chance to sound off. Would you agree that in some extreme cases when all else has failed, public humiliation may be the more practical way to let a son or daughter realize the severity of their crime?
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