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Selfless or selfish spectrum

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On a life spectrum where selflessness is on one side and selfishness is on the opposite side, where do you bench? Do you feel one is better than the other? Google defines selfless as, “concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than with one's own; unselfish.” And, selfish as, “(of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.”

Society views one who is selfless as a hero while a selfish individual is disrespected. Obviously someone more concerned with the greater whole as apposed to someone concerned with only oneself, is more of a positive, correct?

My hope for you is that you fall right in the middle of both of these realms. Why, because moderation and balance of each is the healthiest place to bench. If you are selfless, I’m guessing you are not taking care of yourself; perhaps you’re trying to save the world in an attempt to save yourself? And, if you are selfish I’m guessing you are not making an effort to take good care of anyone but yourself; both can be dangerous in extremes. Doesn’t is seem like we’re an all or nothing type of society?

Why does it have to be one or the other? I think when we have healthy boundaries, we are able to choose when we want to make sacrifices wisely, (as long as they are inline with our moral compass), and we also know when we must reserve our strength and energy to retreat and recharge (a necessary time to be selfish in order to be self-full). After all, you can’t give what you do not have! We must be selfish at times when we most need our own priorities to be met.

The older I get the better I realize that living between black and white, within the shades of gray, really is an optimal place. Be smart and spend your energy wisely; it truly is priceless!

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