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Pentagon zombie apocalypse: Military's secret computer network has zombie plan

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The Pentagon zombie apocalypse plan found on the U.S. military’s secret computer network reveals that the Pentagon is not only prepared for an apocalypse caused by other foreign countries -- but also by zombies. “Never fear the night of the living dead -- the Pentagon has got you covered,” reports CNN on May 16. Usually, documents included on the military’s secret computer network are classified and not meant to be seen by the general public. However, a document called "CONOP 8888" is unclassified by the Defense Department and has found its way into the media via the Foreign Policy magazine.

“Buried on the military's secret computer network is an unclassified document, obtained by Foreign Policy, called ‘CONOP 8888.’ It's a zombie survival plan, a how-to guide for military planners trying to isolate the threat from a menu of the undead -- from chicken zombies to vegetarian zombies and even ‘evil magic zombies’ -- and destroy them.”

CONOP 8888, otherwise known as "Counter-Zombie Dominance," is dated April 30, 2011, and is the Pentagon’s zombie apocalypse plan showing that officials from the U.S. Strategic Command are prepared for a planet-wide attack by the walking dead. Navy Capt. Pamela Kunze, a spokeswoman for Strategic Command, acknowledged the document exists on a "secure Internet site," but since the zombie plan is an unclassified document, it can be read in pdf format.

In its Security Instructions section “3. (U),” the document explains the reason for having an unclassified plan against a zombie attack. “This document is unclassified to ensure maximum utility during times of crisis. Classified capabilities used to counter zombies will be addressed in appropriate orders and annexes aadapted [this is how it is spelled in the document] during crisis action planning to adapt the actions in this plan to current operational conditions.”

In section “4. (U),” CONOP 8888 continues with the following: “This document contains information affecting the national defense of the United States within the meaning of the Espionage Laws, title 18, United States Code, sections 793 and 794. The transmission or revelation of information contained herein, in any manner, to an unauthorized person is prohibited by law.”

According to the secret (but non-secret plan), the purpose of CONOP 8888 is to preserve “non-zombie” humans from the threats posed by a zombie horde, “to establish and maintain a vigilant defensive condition aimed at protecting humankind from zombies, to aid civil authorities in maintaining law and order and restoring basic services during and after a zombie attack,” and -- to eradicate zombies.

According to Navy Capt. Pamela Kunze, the 31-page document is reportedly not a U.S. Strategic Command plan but a “training tool used in an in-house training exercise where students learn about the basic concepts of military plans and order development through a fictional training scenario."

However, the Pentagon zombie apocalypse training exercise is impressive, detailed, and addresses all types of zombie life forms including flesh-eating zombies, zombies from outer space, zombies created through radiation, and vegetarian zombies who only feed on vegetation. The rules of engagement with zombies are clearly spelled out within the document. In the event of a worst case scenario zombie attack where lots of zombies are eating lots of people, the government is determined to fight the invaders with all its forces, to prevent panic, and to maintain order in the country.While Defense officials stress that CONOP 8888 is no indication that an invasion of zombies is on the horizon, the document states in its disclaimer that "this plan was not actually designed as a joke."

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