On last night's hit Bravo show "Kathy," Kathy Griffin hosted three stars from television, stage and screen along with her adorable mother and assistant Tiffany. She had on a nice place dress with Lady Gaga shoulder pads.
As the episode opened, she mentioned the breakup of Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough. On last week's show, she admitted via lie detector test, that she was sexually attracted to Ryan Seacrest. She then went through the litany of women she does not want him to hook up with. In another spoof of "Law & Order," she found herself in a courtroom with all murdered people; except her 92-year-old mother Maggie. In the end, Maggie protested working for her and killed Kathy too, then proceeded to walk out of the courtroom with her young love and seeing-eye-dog.
She then introduced her guests who are not all gay: Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Darren Criss is not gay, but plays a gay character on Glee and Lily Tomlin. Jesse Tyler Ferguson plays Mitchell Pritchett on the sitcom Modern Family. Darren Criss is best known for his portrayal of Blaine Anderson, an openly gay high-school student, on the Fox television series Glee. Darren is not gay, but openly supports LGBT rights. Lily Tomlin has been a national treasure since the 1960s when she appeared on Laugh-In, and currently stars as Lillie Mae on the ABC sitcom Malibu Country.
All three were prepared to match wits with the irreverent Kathy, who asked piercing questions of them about their roles on their shows. In her segment "Explain This," a photo of Jesse coming out of the ocean wearing a scuba mask and shirt revealing a beer belly and huge belly button; Jesse turned fifty shades of red and begged them to take it down. Lily had to explain a photo of her kissing John Travolta long ago, and each had hair about the same length. In another picture of her dressed similar to a British monarch, she revealed that it was her Oscar attire, before it became such the fashion parade, it has evolved into today. Kathy asked Darren for his explanation and again flashed the photo of Jesse coming out of the water. Jesse then took the pillow from the sofa and proceeded to beat Kathy with it, once more turning red, Jesse laughed so much that tears were rolling from his eyes. Darren was disappointed in his photo of him in gladiator attire that was taken at a carnival and would have much rather seen a picture of him making out with John Travolta while coming out of the ocean. To which Kathy replied; "screw you, Darren."
A photo of a house across from the Westboro Baptist Church, with the infamous congregation of gay bashers that is painted like a rainbow and due to ordinances, it can remain in that condition. Kathy then asked if any of them were ever protested? All agreed that they were, but Lily commented that there is too much promiscuity on television.
Kathy mentioned that the new television show, "The Bible" had a character who plays Satan, who glaringly resembles President Obama. Lily said that it was Obama's stage name. She then mentioned the show "Splash," a conglomeration of "D-list" celebrities who dive into a pool to compete ala "Dancing With the Stars." As a member of the "D-list" herself, Kathy knows that nobody on the panel would ever do something like that; except one. Then she proceeded to show a clip of Lily doing a flip into a tank of water on one of her comedy specials.
In her next segment; "I'll Watch It For You," she mentioned "Urban Tarzan," a show where wild animals are removed from people's property. In the episode Kathy watched, there was an alligator in a woman's pool, presumably put there by her ex-husband. As she answered the door in a purple satin robe, Kathy stated that it started off like a porn flick. In another episode, a bull was running through a corn maze, and yet another where a chimpanzee was drinking cough syrup and then in another room he had a gun pointed at the "Urban Tarzan." Kathy mentioned that he had 65 Twitter followers and Darren volunteered to be 66.
Kathy asked Darren when was the last time he had sex with a woman, and he said he did not want to embarrass Lily, but it was backstage, a half-hour ago.
Kathy invited an audience member to join them, so she could rummage through his man-purse. Inside she found: condoms, lip balm, prop money, a party popper that he demonstrated and then posed for a group picture.
For more fun, tune in to "Kathy" on Bravo on Thursday nights; you too may learn something or shudder at what you hear!
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