Bai Ling transcripts: A personal bisexual chat with the unpredictable indie starlet

A chat with Bai Ling

By Mike Szymanski

(These are the spicy more personal excerpts of transcripts after a few hours of interviews with the actress Bai Ling)

We first met at a red carpet interview in front of the Chinese Theatre in 1994 where she gave interviews talking about her first American movie The Crow.

"Hi, I'm Bai," she said in an intriguingly seductive way.

Within weeks, her unique first name, and her poor English had inadvertently outed as bisexual. She didn't mind, but she never discussed it in great detail—until now.

Her English has improved, and she works steadily, appearing on TV in Lost and Entourage, and for notable directors such as Oliver Stone in Nixon, Spike Lee for She Hate Me and George Lucas in a part that was mostly cut in Star Wars: Episode III—Revenge of the Sith. This coming year, she's playing a myriad of colorful characters that include a lesbian, a magician, a transsexual, a prostitute, a man, a mermaid and a stripper.

At a recent lunch squirreled away in the back of a Santa Monica restaurant, she sipped a non-fat latte and picked at her mango chicken salad as we shared a bowl of French onion soup. She chatted about her work, her upcoming projects, and she decided that she's going to offer a bit more of a peek at her private bisexual life.

Q: You've been out as a bisexual for a long time, but you never really talk about it, why not?

A: I'm very open in a lot of ways, but my relationships I like to keep private. I am bisexual, that is me, but that doesn't mean I should discuss other people I'm with—that is private.

Q: It sounded like at first that it was a joke, or a misunderstanding, that you were bi because of your first name?

A: Yes, yes, at first when I was in the United States I didn't always have an interpreter in interviews and I didn't speak English so well. There was some confusion. My name is pronounced "bi," so when I was asked, "Are you bi?" I said, "Yes, I am Bai." Do you like men? "Of course!" Do you like women? "Why yes!" And later I found out what that means and I said, "Sure, I am bi!" But I think the interpreters and the reporters thought that I didn't know what I was saying because I was so open about it. They were uncomfortable about it. Such a thing is not important for me.

Q: That was long before this recent trend in bi chic that seems to be around once again—with people like Lindsay Lohan, Megan Fox, Fergie, Lady Gaga all talking about being bisexual. What do you think of that?

A: Wow, yes, Lady Gaga, mmm, she's hot. I don't know, I don't follow what other people say, I don't watch TV. Megan Fox? That's nice. If they say that that's nice. Everyone has their own journey and their own right to do or say whatever they want, but their sexuality should not be controversial. If they want to say they are bisexual, that's good, but not for publicity.

Q: Well, Megan Fox for example says she's bi but she has trouble dating some women.

A: Oh, well that's too bad, she is missing out. (Laughs.)

Q: So, let's talk about when you first figured out you were attracted to both men and women. Do you remember the first time?

A: Oh yes, I always liked the boys, but it may be blasphemous to say, but it was during my time with the mandatory enlistment, when I was in the Chinese People's Liberation Army, when I was stationed in Tibet, that I learned that I liked women, too.

Q: That sounds exciting! I will ask, so you have to tell.

A: I was 14 in the Chinese Communist Army, and several of us women were in one room. I remember a higher officer in charge of the group was taking care of us all. She also had stomach-aches and she had to have one of us touch her stomach while she was in warm water in the bath. … She also had me sit on her lap, and until then I had never kissed a woman. It was strange and alluring to me, and she had me touch her every week for about one hour in the warm bath.

Q: Did other people know about this?

A: I think so, we were with each other 24 hours a day, taking showers, washing our faces and our feet and our butts with each other. We were not allowed to talk with men because it was forbidden, but it was OK to be intimate with women. Sometimes, a marriage was arranged by the government or a family member, and I remember one woman who was crying because she was no longer allowed to shower with women. We were so intimate, sleeping in the same bunk, touching each other. It was very erotic and very beautiful and pure.

Q: Did you and your friends think it was normal, or was it a big forbidden secret?

A: We liked it, but we did not have a concept of bisexuality, it was just being free. I began to appreciate that intimacy while we were sleeping in our bunk beds. We just started kissing, and it was great.

Q: Wow, you should write about that—

A: I am working on a book about my early youth experiences, I call it right now "Letters from Tibet." I work on it whenever I have some time.

Q: You've been known for your relationships with famous men— and very different kinds of guys, too.

A: I told you I don't talk about them.

Q: That's fine, but I don't want to perpetuate anything that isn't true, so let me know if any of these guys are not true— Lionel Richie, Nick Carter, Chris Isaak and Mickey Rourke. I mean, there can't be a more diverse group of guys!

A: (Giggles) They are all part of me, they are all different and they are all my friends. No details.

Q: What about women? Any famous women?

A: I have had quite a few experiences with women. A couple of them were very erotic experiences that were quite unique.

Q: Famous?

A: Well, I did have a passing flirtation with Angelina Jolie while making The Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow.

Q: I did an interview with her for that, it was very strange, with you guys all on boxes and green screens, right?

A: It was very unusual, and we had a moment, but I didn't pursue it. And now, what would it be! I always thought Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie would be a great threesome. He is very handsome, she is better. I always liked her. I always wanted us to be lovers because she is so sexy and intelligent. I think that would be a great threesome.

Q: Definitely a bisexual paradise. Have you ever played a character who is bisexual?

A: No, not yet. I am a lesbian in Dim Sum Funeral, I play a part that was written for a man as Mafia leader in a movie coming out next year called The Confidant, and then the stripper—

Q: Yeah, you've been getting good reviews for that little indie film A Beautiful Life.

A: That was a part that Denise Richards was supposed to take, but they gave it to me at the last minute and I didn't know how to be a stripper. I went with the director [Alejandro Chomski] to some of the girl strip bars on Sunset Boulevard and I was dancing in the corner while I was watching some of the girls, and the guys were looking over at me in the club, and the manager told me to stop because I was getting all the attention. I also play a high-paid prostitute in an upcoming movie called Love Ranch by Taylor Hackford [who directed Ray] and she's a real character named Samantha Smoke and it's about the first legal brothel in the U.S. in Nevada, and I got the role even though the character was written for a white girl, not an Asian.

Q: And you're going to play a mermaid? I saw some weird poster for it.

A: Oh yes, I'm a magical mermaid in Hydrophobia, but we haven't shot that yet. I play a movie star in Malibu who suddenly disappears, and comes back with other-worldly powers.

Q: No bisexuals in all those roles? You have 10 movies coming up next year alone.

A: Now, I want to play a character who is bi, like me. No one will know if she likes women or men because she likes both. I want to play that, it would be a great part. I am a lover of both men and women.

Q: Do you think guys are threatened by that? How does that affect your possible relationships?

A: I do not believe that monogamy is natural. I think one night stands are a most brilliant experience. I put it all out on the table up front, I'm playful and sexy. I am a hopeless romantic, but I don't look out for a lifetime commitment or a one-night stand, I just leave myself open to all possibilities.

Q: Do you ever want to settle down with one person?

A: Not right now.

Q: Could you see yourself settling down with a woman?

A: That's a good question. Yes, maybe. I love women, I like their company, they are very soft, but don't try to box me in and hold me down because I like men. I have great sex with women, but you cannot keep me. There will be betrayal.

Q: What about a three-way relationship? A lot of bi folk think that a threesome would be a perfect relationship. Have you tried that?

A: Oh yes, with two guys, I had a triad relationship, but unfortunately, the guys were not bisexual, too. We cuddled all three, that was fun, but I was the one they were sharing. . . . A three-way relationship would not work for a really long time, maybe it could if everyone is free with their emotions and are not hung up on being monogamous. Our nature is that we are animals. There is no way one person can satisfy you forever.

Q: So what would be a perfect relationship for you?

A: A perfect relationship would be with a man or a woman, or three or four, but it would have to be something that makes me heart smile. It doesn't matter man or woman, but I have to feel like every day is like my birthday—that's important for me.

Q: That sounds nice.

A: This was fun. With all the interviews I've done, I don't think I've ever discussed my bisexuality so much in any interview. I know I haven't.

Q: Not even to Howard Stern? (She goes on his radio show semi-regularly.)

A: He makes people talk about a lot of things they don't want to say, but no, not even to him.

Q: Well, I'm glad to able to talk about it. (I give her a copy of my book "The Bisexual's Guide to the Universe")

A: I'm very comfortable talking about it with you, and besides you wrote the book on it.
 

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