MIAMI, GULF OF MEXICO, COZUMEL -- After nine months of hype, the inaugural 70,000 Tons of Metal cruise arrived and not only stayed afloat. It brought down the house.

Billed as "The world's largest floating heavy metal festival," it would be an understatement to say the Jan. 24-28 event aboard Royal Caribbean's Majesty of the Seas was a success. Forty-two bands played two shows apiece, an extravaganza witnessed by a sold-out throng of 2,038 guests from 48 countries representing every continent. There were also 100 journalists (including the SAMME as the lone media representative from San Antonio), and approximately 900 crew members, all helping to make the occasion something that no one involved will ever forget.

Though American passengers led the way with 30% representation, that's a relatively low figure considering Miami was the port of call. It also speaks to the dedication toward heavy metal of those around the globe, which included 17% from Germany, 12% Canadians and 7% Australians.

Guests also came from Argentina, Austria, Belgium, Bolivia, Bosnia, Bulgaria, Chile, China, Colombia, Costa Rica, Czech Republic, Denmark, Dominican Republic, Estonia, Faroe Islands, Finland, France, Greece, Hong Kong, Hungary, Ireland, Israel, Italy, Japan, Luxembourg, Mexico, Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Peru, Philippines, Poland, Portugal, Romania, Russia, Saudi Arabia, Slovakia, Slovenia, South Africa, Spain, Sweden, Switzerland, Turkey and the U.K.

No matter how many concerts one attends in a lifetime, a floating festival of this magnitude is arguably the only place where you could:

• Witness that many bands playing virtually round the clock, including some that played from 3:15-4 a.m.
• Share cocktails with band members
• Watch thrash bands team up for karaoke renditions of Abba's "Dancing Queen," K.C. and the Sunshine Band's "Get Down Tonight" and Kool & The Gang's "Celebration"
• Squeeze in a little workout while Testament singer Chuck Billy rides a stationary bike a few feet away in a fitness center overlooking the Gulf of Mexico
• Walk around Cozumel and hang out on the beach with Death Angel bassist Damien Sisson
• Sit in a jacuzzi or work on your tan while Uli Jon Roth, Testament, Exodus, Forbidden, Fear Factory, Death Angel and many others play the main stage on the top deck of the ship
• Watch a belly-flopping contest judged by members of Nevermore & Sanctuary
• Witness Sanctuary's first concerts in 20 years

The SAMME did that and more and over the next couple of weeks will be presenting interviews, concert reviews and slideshows (starting with the one at top left) of general madness the likes of which you may never see.

Unless you save up for the next cruise.

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