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15 Different Types of Love

 

Last night when driving home from work, I said to my husband, ‘I wonder what I’ll write about tomorrow morning?’ (It can be challenging to come up with a new topic daily). He said, ‘Well, you are the NY Love Examiner so why not write about different kinds of love? There’ve been many times when my husband has inspired my writing. So, here goes…
 
Today I won’t be spouting research, merely musing about the different kinds of love we hear mentioned, for what may become one part in a series.
 
                                 So What is Love?
 
Here is my general conception of love: It’s a warm feeling based upon knowing and accepting someone. This relationship often involves mutual learning, caring and growth. Also, when you love someone you generally want them to be happy.
 
The dictionary.com definition of love had a few versions:
 
-a profoundly tender passionate affection for another person
-a sexual passion or desire
-a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection
 
Which could lead to another question (and article): Is love a concept, feeling or action?
 
But for today, below are some different kinds of love that we hear mentioned. These are not dictionary definitions; I am defining them with my stream-of-conscious associations. This will give you an opportunity to think about each kind of love and offer your definitions as well.
 
                                 15 Different Kinds of Love:
 
Infatuation- loving feelings towards a love object that are largely based upon fantasy and idealization (instead of experience). Often when partners get to know each other, infatuation diminishes.
 
Romantic Love- An abiding love for a partner with whom you feel passion, attraction, caring and respect.
 
Eros- a passionate love usually involving sexual feelings for a love interest.
 
Companionate Love- feelings of warmth towards a friend with whom you love to spend time
 
Unconditional Love- A type of affection and caring that is so strong that you feel it consistently, regardless of what that other person does
 
Conditional Love- A love that requires specific action or conditions in order to be maintained. For example, at its extreme, a parent who gives very conditional love would only love his child when he gets straight A’s, becomes a surgeon and has two children. The love is based on outside conditions and when they do not occur, the love is withdrawn.
 
Puppy Love- A childish, innocent temporary crush on someone that you don’t know well.
 
Maternal Love- This term usually connotes love that is nurturing, accepting and protective. In actuality this love can also be given by a father etc.
 
Paternal Love- This term connotes love that involves guidance and some authority. Paternal love usually prepares a child to be ready for the outside world. Again, in reality this type of love is not gender specific.
 
Soulmate Love- This type of love is described as a love that has survived multiple life times. Not everyone believes in this concept.
 
Spiritual/Divine Love- This type of love recognizes the Divine light in everyone and everything. Love is given to everyone as an act of loving God.
 
Love of your country or patriotism- This is love for the place you live or the place that were born. It is a type of loyalty and a special feeling of belonging that you attribute to that specific geographic location.
 
Self-Love- This is a positive feeling that you have about who you are and what you deserve. It often is expressed by treating yourself well, respecting yourself, wanting yourself to be happy and expecting others to respect you too.
 
Brotherly Love- This term connotes having a feeling of love for your neighbor, because all humanity is considered to be part of a larger family of human beings.
 
Tough Love- This term is used to describe a love that is expressed by setting boundaries for the good of the other person. So for example, a parent may send their teenager to rehab if he is drug addicted, even if he does not want to go. They feel that this is an act of love because it stems from a desire for their son’s ultimate good and happiness.
 
 
Which Types of Love Have You Experienced?
 
 
 
Have I forgotten any other kinds of love? So many types of love are mentioned in our society. We understand these terms conceptually and most of us have had experiences of feeling these different kinds of love but most of us haven’t sat and meditated upon what love means to us and which kind we consciously want to give and receive in our relationships.
 
So today I ask you to consider the above different definitions of love and see if you can comment with any additions.
 
Also feel free to share the type of love you most want to give and receive in your life right now and which type of love feels the most challenging and why.
 
Thanks!
 
My Best in Love, (which kind do you ask?:)
 
Paulette
 
Bio:
 
Dr. Paulette Kouffman Sherman is a licensed psychologist and author of ‘Dating From the Inside Out: How to Use the Law of Attraction in Matters of the Heart’ by Atria Books, award Winner of the National ‘Best Books’ of 2008 in the category of Self-Help: Relationships. She’s the Director of http://www.mydatingschool.com which offers coaching and classes in unconscious mating. She was a speaker of The Learning Annex and an expert on television shows such as the CBS Early Show & the AM Northwest Early Show. She has been quoted in publications such as MSN.com, USA Weekend, Lifetime.com, Reader’s Digest, ‘Glamour,’ ‘Seventeen’ ‘Complete Woman’ magazine and the NY Times. 
 
 

Comments

  • julie husson 5 years ago

    I really enjoy and get alot from your articles. I need to figure out how to forward them to my gmail address. When I try and print them it does not work for some reason from this site.
    Thanks.
    Julie

  • amanda hugnkiss 3 years ago

    i suck cheesy bumring

  • trees aregreen 3 years ago

    hello call me 01536395117 <3

  • alexie 3 years ago

    great.... we all have such a big heart, that we are capable of loving more than one person , a real meaning of finding and getting love in the most tangible manner

  • Paulette 5 years ago

    Hi Julie,

    Thanks for reading and for letting me know. I will try and subscribe you now so that future articles will go to your email address. Give it a day and if it still doesn't work, let me know. Then I'll try contacting tech support.

    Have a great night,

    Paulette

  • whitney 4 years ago

    I would say that soulmate does not imply mutiple lives but a type of unconditonal love that takes on a spirtual bond as well. example the book becoming soulmates. kind of like taking your unconditonal love to the next level of higher companionship.

  • amanda hugnkiss 3 years ago

    i dont think this is completly true love sucks ass

  • Paulette Sherman 4 years ago

    Whitney,

    Thanks for your comment. The book you mention sounds interesting. I may get it. I was just quickly defining each kind of love in this article but soul mate love is compelling and deserves deeper exploration.

  • sara 4 years ago

    agape love?

  • Shirley 4 years ago

    Agape love!! :)) Highest and best!! :))) Phileo as well, which is friendship love! Great article!

  • Lexi 4 years ago

    As i read the diffret kinds of love, i thought of a person i could i relate it too for almost all the diffrent types. You must've put quite some thought into writing this article because it's beautifully written,and fully described each type of love.

  • raquel 3 years ago

    so true ...most people don't usually get the dept of love but u nailed it ..thank u for such enlightenment .

  • CHE 4 years ago

    o my god i hate love.. koz nowadays all boys r unfaithful... so u guyzz beware of love...

  • amy 4 years ago

    love never seems real to me i always think its some kind of fantasy or whatever. now i think love is such a waste of life and time. oh and you can think its real but it could litterally kill you. you cant blame me for the words i just said because there are reasons why i feel the way i do

  • kier 4 years ago

    wanted txtm8te

    09262233871

  • mary jane 4 years ago

    sarap kayang magmahal, lalo na kung mahal ka din ng taong mahal mo....

  • jomarose 4 years ago

    pangit ang love dame man loloko dyan

  • annieng 4 years ago

    ...hehe love b?hmmMm for me 8's only a game,don't spect to much.advYc q lng wag mxdong iserious yn>>msakit kc s dib2x pagnsaktan kna.

  • yancy_mae 4 years ago

    hi_ i reflect to my self how beautiful to live with all the love that we share to others_ wag nating baliwalain ang pagmamahal kasi kung nagmahal tayo_ d2 natin makikita ang mga nagmamahal sa atin! proctice to love others,so that you wll beloved_
    nakatulong tong article na to sa project ko_ SA3 THE TOPIC IS ALL about love...

  • yancy_mae 4 years ago

    hindi hinderance ang masaktan_ tinuturuan lang tayo sa lahat ng bagay_
    magmahal ng tama
    wag mag abusa! para masaya : )

  • Amandeep Singh Mann 4 years ago

    What does is mean by "NY Love Examiner" ?

    From you article it looks not too much scientific proofs have gone in. I am not saying your article is incorrect. Just saying a little bit of science could help understand better.

  • Anonymous 3 years ago

    I do not know what to call this form of love. I simply can not
    get him out of my mind and heart. I allways thought one can not love two person at the same time.
    I never thought i will ever go through this kind of feelings towards another man.The same feelings I went through with my husband. All those beautiful and painful feelings.
    I thought that was it.
    Then i met him on line (the other man) gradualy all those feelings came back, all those heart beats, exciment and ....
    the funny thing is we have not met each other face to face,
    he lives in different state then I.
    and he is younger than I, way younger.

    the only regreat that i have is that i told him that i am in love with him, and he freaked out,he went bezerk and very upset,
    I tryied to explain to him, but he blocked and removed me from all our socianl net works.He rejected me in a way that i felt my God what have i done, all I did was just love him from far and yet he acted as if i have killled some one.

    The funny thing is I have always asked myself what I will do if and when I see him in person, and I have blocked out
    that senaroio from my mind, cause i really do not know.

    I have found him through other social net works, how ever I do not dare to ask him to be in my friend list.or me be on his. Over the years I have just followed him through pages.

    ah, now dear lady you tell me what should i call or name
    this kind of love.

  • Anonymous 3 years ago

    I am interested in this article. Can I have subscription from you. my email is asbaran1987@gmail.com

    Thank you

    Asbaran

  • jayrald.. 3 years ago

    this web site is so nice cause we can really identify what is kind of feelings that we have...!

  • JAYRALD 3 years ago

    and this is also important for every individual person to learned and to determined there feelings ..so that no one will get hurt any more !

  • A. Murphy 3 years ago

    Well I know love as giving selflessly of ones self without looking for anything in return. Agape is the unconditional giving of yourself no matter what the circumstances (i.e. the love that a parent should have for their child.)
    Eros or infactuation is temporary and based off of feelings of the moment and fantasy (i.e. not knowing a person very well.

  • A. Muurphy 3 years ago

    If anyone has any other questions or comments in response to my last comment then please contact me at bjemurphy@yahoo.com.

  • christee 3 years ago

    as i was browsing a topic about different kinds of love, i saw this article which i find it perfect for my research...thank u for the article..>3

  • Anonymous 3 years ago

    this is a great article :)

  • giery 3 years ago

    yeah........the truth is hindi kailangan hanapin ang love dahil kusa itong lalapit sa tamang panahon.....

  • PaulMark 2 years ago

    For the most part I think English is a great language but when it comes to love, English comes a bit short. Here are some examples of love just off the top of my limited mind. I love my folks, my dog, my Harley Davidson, my girl friend, my wife, (LOL just kiddin I’m single) my kids, nature, a good party, a good sermon, a good pay check, a nice sunset, when things go my way, misery loves company, I love justice, I love vengeance, I love attention, I love popularity, I love football, I love a good movie. I love myself. Jesus said “Love you’re neighbor as you love your self”. So it’s okay to love ones self, but know there is a selfish love and an unselfish love. That’s all I got at the moment and these are all different types of love to me.
    I love you all, and shalom Ya’ll

  • Anonymous 2 years ago

    ah naun alam ko na kung ano ang love?

  • joefelpilapil@yahoo.com 2 years ago

    i like the sentence u have am so proud the person who write it thank u 4 the suport u gave to me on my own self!!!!!!1

  • Anonymous 2 years ago

    You forgot:

    unrequited love - when you love someone but they don't love you back

    and

    forbidden love - when you are not allowed to see/ be with/ date your lover.

    But aside from that well done!

  • Anonymous 2 years ago

    You forgot shallow love and jealous love and mutual love.

  • FuKc EveRy1 2 years ago

    NiQqA Fukc UUUU

  • Isabel 2 years ago

    There is certainly alot of overlap. Hardly any relationship consists in just one of these types of loves. It seems alot of them are just potential aspects of your relationship (broadly defined) with someone. For instance, it seems to me that agape, divine love, unconditional love, and most of the other loves associated with parenting mentioned above (except for the unconditional one) are very similiar if not identical. Depending of course on your theological beliefs, if you have any.

  • Anonymous 1 year ago

    eros

  • Orange 1 year ago

    Thank you for writing this article, it gave me some ideas about what to write for my school essay. I will cite it of course.

  • judy ann salut 1 year ago

    my comment in this research help me so much.Thats why for those who post it in this page thank you so much...........

  • mercy queen hepiga 1 year ago

    ganda naman...sanah love din akoh nang taong mahal ko...at ang pangalan nyah ay Jason Padayao.....

  • Rigo E. 1 year ago

    I believe "Spiritual/Divine Love" is actually call, "Agape" correct me if I'm wrong.

  • Anonymous 1 year ago

    Finally an article that articulates the meanings of love beyond the Christian dogma and explains how you can love different people in different ways. As a gentleman with more beautiful lady friends than guy friends, dating relationships are challenging because of the suspicion and jealousy that often rear their heads. For most my love is compassionate but a few of them have crossed the line into romantic love but been pulled back across the threshold to compassionate. Yet for a handful there is unconditional love that most outsiders don't understand. These few ladies know I have their backs and I know that they have mine, yet we're respectful of the boundaries. Everyone has a soulmate out there and those who are fortunate enough to have everything fall into place enjoy fairy tale love, while the rest feel it but are unable or unwilling to boldly act upon it and take it to that level, hence unrequited love.

  • Ken K. Chartrand 1 year ago

    All of these must be in proper balance

  • shugar assim 1 year ago

    nakakakilig

  • Maryjoy Delfin 1 year ago

    gusto q yung puppy love parang laro lang hindi seneseryoso.

  • Anonymous 11 months ago

    Thanks 4 this article,may i have subscription my email address dricisamuel@yahoo.com

  • Denny Lukman 10 months ago

    I don't know what words I should use to describe 'when you feel indeed attach to something(like laptop, gun, doll, etc) and take care of the thing' one.

    can you help me?

  • joy 10 months ago

    The love I feel for his guy I don't understand is like I don't see him for past fourteen years and has i see him is like I can sleep I don't t eat I just want hear him all the time I weak up with him on my mind I go my bed with him on my mind

  • Anonymous 10 months ago

    open your eye and choose a man of your choice

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