Most of us assume that having a good sex life is important to men in relationships, but a new study shows it's just as important to women. In fact, one in five women would end a relationship over bad sex.
DatingAdvice.com surveyed more than 1,000 Americans to see if "bad sex" would end a relationship for them, and found that 22% of women, or about one in five, said it would be a deal-breaker.
According to Rachel Dack, women’s dating expert for DatingAdvice.com, satisfying sex is about more than just physical excitement for women. It’s about bonding with a partner and having emotional needs met, too. “Many [women] report that connecting with their partner during sex is more important than having an orgasm,” Dack said. “Connecting might include touching, caressing, communicating and feeling understood by her partner, especially when she feels her partner makes it a priority to please her.”
Dack also said that many women also report feeling "distressed, frustrated or unsure of the relationship if the relationship is sexless or they do not feel physically compatible to their partners."
Men are even more likely to end a relationship over bad sex, with one in three saying they would.
Gary Lewandowski Jr., who is the chair of the department of psychology at Monmouth University and co-creator of ScienceofRelationships.com, believes that there are more men and women who would end a relationship due to unsatisfying sex than the study found, but they are unwilling to admit it.
“They don’t want to look bad by saying bad sex was a deal-breaker,” he said.
The study also found single Americans are 36 percent more likely than married Americans to break up with someone because of bad sex. And Americans aged 35-44 are the most picky about their sex lives, with 32% saying bad sex is a deal-breaker, compared to 27% of 25-34 year-olds and 25% of 45-64 year-olds.
According to Lewandowski: “In new relationships and for those who are single, sex is more important or central to the relationship,” he said. “For married individuals, sex is still important but not as central.”
The study was conducted over a period of three weeks, balancing responses by age, gender, income, race, sexuality and other factors in order to accurately represent the U.S. population.