MTV to document animal rights concert

Animal rights are so hot right now.

First, Washingtonians were lucky enough to have Bo Derek in town on several occasions last year when she lobbied on behalf of a horse-slaughter ban being considered by Congress.

Then, Yeas & Nays brought you the news that the Barbi twins (Shane and Sia), who rose to fame thanks to their September 1991 and January 1993 appearances in Playboy magazine and countless posters and calendars, were joining Derek’s efforts, planning to visit Washington in November and organize an “Animal Aid Live” concert in California.

Now, MTV is getting involved.

Yeas & Nays has learned that MTV and the Barbi twins are putting the final details on a reality show documenting the twins’ efforts to organize the concert.

As of this writing, filming is scheduled to begin in March, and individuals involved in the project hope to begin with an animal rights march in Washington, to be followed by a concert in November. Willie Nelson, executive producer of “Farm Aid,” and his daughter, Amy, will also be involved in the concert’s organization, and the reality series will chronicle efforts to sign bands, secure sponsors and organize a Farm Aid-like festival.

When reached, the Barbi twins would not comment for the record about the show but were more than willing to open up about animal rights and their gripes with, what they call, “the Enron organizations of animal rights”: People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals and the Humane Society of the United States.

“PETA murders animals,” Shane said. “All of their money never touches an animal. All they do is rally up your emotions to get you so sad that you donate money, and it never gives a solution.”

“PETA has a higher kill rate than any other adoption center in the world,” Sia said.

How did they come to these conclusions? “We may get pegged as bimbos,” Shane said, “but we did our research.”

Both PETA and the Humane Society disputed the twins’ characterizations of their organizations. The Humane Society even offered up a recent e-mail from the twins, which states, “We love you guys and see you using your muscle to stop the most inhumane business going on ... horse slaughter!”

PETA Director Michael McGraw said, “[The twins’ depiction of PETA] comes out of left field, quite frankly. … Our entire budget is available on our Web site. … We actually employ among some of the lower salaries.”

“And we are not murderers,” he added.

Matthews tries to stump Miss America hopefuls

As one of the key judges at the Miss America pageant in Las Vegas this weekend, MSNBC’s Chris Matthews pulled out his “Hardball” best when it came time to question each of the contestants.

“Why did Mississippi seem to do a better job than” Louisiana in the wake of Hurricane Katrina?” he asked Miss Mississippi.

“If you had a long plane ride, who would you rather sit next to, Bill Clinton or George W. Bush?” he queried another.

“Why can’t [Oprah] find a guy?” he continued.

And even though it didn’t air on TV, Miss D.C., Kate Michael, said Matthews dominated her interview, asking her several political questions. “He asked me where Osama bin Laden is now,” she said.

But the strangest query he concocted had to be this one, aimed at another contestant: “Faulkner never used commas when he wrote. Why is that?”

Matthews was unavailable for comment, but he is indeed correct about the author’s punctuation peculiarities, said Professor Wayne Knoll, a Faulkner expert at Georgetown.

Faulkner “wants us to hear, not see,” said Knoll. “He’s writing from a Southern oral tradition.” Plus, “he’s deliberately employing a stream of consciousness.”

As for Michael herself, the tall brunette tells us she was a “little surprised” that she didn’t make the top 10, but said, “I felt like I did the very best I could in all areas of competition.”

Gary Sinise’s big appetite

“People tell me I’m smiling only when I’m playing my music,” said actor Gary Sinise last week at the National Press Club.

Based on what sources witnessed over this weekend, he’s right. Each time he addressed a crowd, he did so through his steely, deadly serious gaze. But when it came time to take the stage with his Lt. Dan Band, as he did at the Washington Auto Show to benefit families of wounded veterans, he was all smiles.

Sinise stayed at the Marriott Courtyard on Thomas Circle, where he he had breakfast, lunch and dinner at Nage Restaurant on Saturday. For breakfast, we hear he opted for Atkins-friendly scrambled eggs, bacon and no potatoes.

After a lunchtime burger, he came down from his room to grab a few Red Bulls before the show.

Then after the show, he returned with about 16 people for dinner.

Sinise is on the host committee for tonight’s Disabled Veterans’ LIFE Memorial Foundation reception at the Reagan Building.

Wizards in middle of financial pack

Thanks to Forbes, we learn that the Washington Wizards are the 15th most profitable NBA franchise, out of 30 teams. The team had $14.8 million in operating income on revenues of $108 million in 2005-06, and is worth $334 million.

That’s quite a bit better than the Wizards’ building mates, the Capitals, who were ranked dead last in profitability by the magazine earlier this month.

Wizards’ owner Abe Pollin has also owned his team since 1964, longer than any other owner.

Miss America, Hannah to make ‘splash’ in D.C.

Congressional Quarterly announced Tuesday that Miss America winner Lauren Nelson will be its guest at the Washington Press Club Foundation’s Annual Congressional Dinner next week.

Nelson is a native of Oklahoma, just like last year’s winner and CQ guest, Jennifer Berry.

“In spite of recent behavior problems regarding beauty pageant winners, we don’t think anyone will have to worry about model behavior; these kind of events are not known for raucous activity,” said a CQ spokeswoman.

We expect the same from actress Daryl Hannah, who’s also a guest of CQ.

Speakeasy

“I would suggest moving back. I’m about to crank this sucker up.”

– President Bush, warning the press pool that he was about to start up a tractor at the Caterpillar factory on Tuesday