Carp, Mt. McKinley, baseball already on congressional menu

The first days of a new Congress is the time for members to introduce pet bills, the ones they want to garner a lot of attention and, if need be, sit on the “to-do” lists of their respective leadership teams for as long as possible.

So among the predictable calls for universal health care, Social Security reform and Iraq, let’s see what some other members picked late last week as their first legislative initiatives of the 110th Congress.

H.R. 83, introduced by Reps. Judy Biggert, R-Ill., and Tom Petri, R-Wis., would “add certain species of carp to the list of injurious species that are prohibited from being imported or shipped.”

Baseball fans will delight and Fidel Castro foes will bristle at H.R. 216, by Rep. Jose Serrano, D-N.Y. It would “waive certain prohibitions with respect to nationals of Cuba coming to the United States to play organized professional baseball.”

With H. J. Res. 8, Serrano also hopes to pass a constitutional amendment to repeal the 22nd Amendment, which would effectively allow presidents to serve more than two terms.

Rep. Jo Ann Davis, R-Va., wants to get all in our business with H.R. 107, which would “define marriage for all legal purposes in the District of Columbia to consist of the union of one man and one woman.”

The lovefest for President Reagan continues, thanks to Rep. Darrell Issa, R-Calif. Issa’s H.R. 27 would “designate the exclusive economic zone of the United States as the ‘Ronald Wilson Reagan Exclusive Economic Zone of the United States.’ ”

As he does every Congress, Rep. Ralph Regula, R-Ohio, introduced a measure “to provide for the retention of the name of Mount McKinley.” Regula represents President McKinley’s hometown and does not want the peak’s official name changed to the native Alaskan “Denali.”

Reps. Cliff Stearns, R-Fla., and Lynn Westmoreland, R-Ga., would require the display of the Ten Commandments in the Capitol, while Rep. Paul Gillmor, R-Ohio, would honor the “thousands of Freemasons in every state in the nation … for their many contributions.”

Some of these pet bills even attracted co-sponsors early on. Rep. John Linder’s, R-Ga., H.R. 25, which would abolish the IRS, repeal the income tax and establish a national sales tax, drew 23 Republicans and even one Democrat, Rep. Dan Boren of Oklahoma. And Rep. John Conyers’s, H.R. 40, which would impanel a commission to study the impact of slavery and discrimination and make recommendations for remedies, drew 15 cosponsors.

So which freshman got in first? That would be Rep. Peter Welch, D-Vt. His H.R. 48 would “redesignate the White Rocks National Recreation Area in the State of Vermont as the Robert T. Stafford White Rocks National Recreation Area,” the better to honor the former senator.

Huckabee: Watch Nick@Nite to end partisanship

We’re barely a week into the new year, and already there are signs of the coarsening of our political optimism.

Rep. Patrick McHenry, R-N.C., told Yeas & Nays that Democrats “are coming into power like a reformed alcoholic.”

And Rep. Barney Frank, D-Mass., brought out the claws last week when he called the Bush administration’s handling of Hurricane Katrina’s aftermath “ethnic cleansing by inaction.”

Can’t we all just get along? Well, Gov. Mike Huckabee might have just the solution. In his new book, “From Hope To Higher Ground,” the Arkansas governor Republican offers “12 Action Steps to STOP Being Cynical.”

1. Don’t believe bad reports without documentation.

2. Read the Bible more; blogs less.

3. Read more from the “Features” page and fewer from the “Letters to the Editor.”

4. Listen to more music and less talk radio.

5. Watch classic films made before 1968.

6. Read biographies.

7. Read magazines about your favorite hobbies. (I read “Runner’s World,” “Bassmasters,” “Ducks Unlimited,” “Men’s Health” and “Bass Player” for example, among others.)

8. Have regular conversations with people very unlike you (race, religion, political party, ethnic background).

9. Do volunteer work with the impoverished, disabled or ill.

10. Write letters of praise to total strangers you read about who do wonderful things.

11. Practice what my Arkansas philanthropist friend Jennings Osborne calls “Random Acts of Kindness.”

12. Watch TV Land and Nick@Nite more; network TV less.

Even celebs take off their hats at Chi-Cha

Even in downtown D.C., not everyone can spot Cedric the Entertainer.

The stand-up and film star arrived at Chi-Cha Lounge on U Street in a white stretch limo Friday night with three male friends. One of them, we’re told, was celebrating a birthday.

As Cedric approached the door, the doorman asked for his ID — “nicely,” a restaurant spokeswoman assures us.

“Cedric kind of laughed but then pulled it out,” she said.

Turns out the doorman didn’t recognize him at all, not even in his usual threads. Chi-Cha’s policy is no hats on men, and as he was bedecked in his trademark suit and hat, the bouncer asked him to remove it.

Cedric obliged and the group left after an undisturbed, unrecognized hour and a half.

Gaping at drapes

In the lead-up to Election Day, some Republicans accused optimistic Democrats of prematurely “measuring the drapes.” Of course, their optimism was justified by big Nov. 7 gains, which leads us to wonder: Exactly what do their drapes now look like?

Well, after all the suspense —heck, even President Bush and White House Chief of Staff Josh Bolten offered to give Speaker Nancy Pelosi decorating advice — Yeas & Nays can tell you that Pelosi has adorned her office with sage and rust-colored drapes.

We now return you to the regularly scheduled politicking. ...

Speakeasy

“[T]aking an entire day to watch the game isn’t what we should spend part of our five-day workweek doing.”

– Rep. Tom Price, R-Ga., criticizing Democrats on the day of the national college football championship for not holding five-day workweeks in January

“I prayed for you at Mass, and then I made a pot of marinara sauce.”

– Father Michael Salerno (Baltimore), speaking Friday to Speaker Nancy Pelosi at a celebration in her honor

Guard yourself

Wizards’ guard Deshawn Stevenson had himself quite a time on Friday.

After contributing to the team’s win over the Clippers, Stevenson hosted a late celebratory dinner for 14 people at Morton’s on Connecticut Avenue, before heading to teammate Gilbert Arenas’ million-dollar 25th birthday bash at Love nightclub.