Flynt still going after Republicans

The sordid drama of President Clinton’s impeachment is a distant memory, but pornographer Larry Flynt is still trying to bring down Republicans as he did in those heady days of 1998.

The September issue of Flynt’s Hustler takes aim at Rep. Tom Feeney, R-Fla. The surprisingly porn-free piece regurgitates a charge by computer programmer Clint Curtis that Feeney, then the speaker of the state House, asked him to “create an electronic vote-rigging software prototype” in 2002.

Curtis also claims Feeney was engaged in high-level corruption, bilked the state out of cash and sold secrets to China.

But that’s not all: Investigator Raymond Lemme, who was looking into Curtis’ allegations in 2003, wound up dead in a motel room. The death was officially ruled a suicide, but Curtis, as well as Hustler’s reporter, Brad Friedman, have their doubts.

The coup de grace: Guess who’s going to face Feeney in November, thanks to his winning the Democratic primary this week? None other than Curtis himself.

Hustler, in fact, endorsed the challenger’s bid in a sidebar.

Which puts Curtis in unenviable company, according to Feeney.

“This is the first time that I’ve had the smut king of America campaign for my opponent,” he said.

“Curtis is not even in the same solar system as the rest of us,” he said. “With tinfoil hats in hand, black helicopters swarming and purple Martians landing, this election promises to be more entertaining than Saturday morning cartoons.”

He said with the support of “rational Democrats,” he expects an 80-20 victory.

A rift in Red Sox Nation

Internecine warfare has broken out between Red Sox fans in the Senate. Speaking from the floor on Wednesday, Sen. Judd Gregg, R-N.H., took issue with Sen. John Kerry’s, D-Mass., call for a vote of no confidence in Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld.

Commenting on Kerry’s “Monday morning quarterbacking,” Gregg said it “sort of makes you think that if he were giving a discussion about the Red Sox ... he wouldn’t have put Bill Buckner at first, he wouldn’t have pitched to Bucky Dent, and definitely wouldn’t have traded Babe Ruth.” Kerry spokesman David Wade couldn’t let that stand.

“New Hampshire’s own Carlton Fisk must’ve felt his blood pressure soar hearing Sen. Gregg mangle Red Sox lore on the floor of the Senate,” said Wade.

Then, citing a lineup of New England villains, Wade added that “when it comes to doing the job as Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld is Bill Buckner, Mike Torrez, and Harry Frazee rolled into one.”

Are you on Olson’s list?

Some of the most important Washingtonians are opening their mailboxes this week to read: “Lady Evelyn Booth and Theodore Bevry Olson, together with their families, request the pleasure of your company at their marriage and celebration.”

Olson, who served as U.S. solicitor general from 2001–04, met the Louisiana native in ’02 at the Kentucky Derby.

Considering that both are known oenophiles and the wedding is in California’s Napa Valley, we’re expecting toasts aplenty.

Who’s hot or cold

Steaming

Former National Security Adviser Sandy Berger

Steaming mad at how he has been depicted in ABC’s “Path to 9/11” film, set to air on Sunday and Monday. “Path” depicts Berger canning a proposed attack on Osama bin Laden in 1998, despite the CIA’s request. Berger said this portrayal “flagrantly misrepresents my actions.”

Hot

Horses

The House, thanks in part to the encouragement of bombshell Bo Derek, passed a ban on horse slaughtering Thursday. Horses everywhere huffed a neigh of relief. Cows, on the other hand, cry foul and claim that Congress is in the pocket of Big Stable.

Lukewarm

Katherine Harris

The Florida Republican congresswoman won the Republican primary in her quest for a U.S. Senate seat, but with Sen. Bill Nelson, D-Fla., widely expected to crush her in the general election, Harris’ smiles this week may be her last for a very long time.

Cool

Immigration

With reform on this issue expected to be dead until after November, one has to wonder: How come every time President Bush dreams big on domestic policy, he loses big

Mold for the old?

Donuts of questionable quality were distributed as a promotional gimmick at Thursday’s Capitol Hill event to promote Americans United’s “Golden Promise” campaign to “protect Social Security and stop privatization.”

By the numbers

13: Percentage of foods served at Wednesday’s Dairy Farmers of America Breakfast in D.C. that were actual dairy products.

15:2: The odds, posted by BetUS.com, that Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld will resign before the end of the year.