During a heated discussion on zombie decapitations involving weed wackers, Paul “Kill ‘em a lot” Krofssik posed a brilliant question… How much of the zombie brain needs to be destroyed before it is redeadinated? This was a complicated query and took some serious consideration.
The simple answer is, destroy all of it. Cleave it, crush it, throw it in a fire. But this level of completion may not be always obtainable. So what must be done to dispatch pursuers as quickly as possible?
First, you must remember that a zombified brain is still just an infected human brain. And as fragile as the brain is, it, and the head protecting it, are designed for punishment. People have had bullets, arrows, tools, rebar, and pipes impale the brain, and have gone on to live long afterward. This can easily happen with a zombie. A small fast puncture that might cause problems for a fully functioning human might be completely shrugged off by a shuffler, possibly leaving you stupefied and vulnerable.
Destroying the cerebellum is a case often made for incapacitation. With no sense of balance the ghoul would simply fall over, if not expire altogether, affording you time to run, or plan, or whatever. This would be a case for small ammunition (bullets, arrows), as anything larger would cause periphery damage. The problem lies in the unlikeliness of the shot. Aiming for a part of another part under combat conditions is bad form already, and the apocalypse is no place to test your luck. On the off chance you make the 1 in 100 shot, the zombie goes down and you live to fight another day. The other 99 times you miss completely and die by eating.
One must take heed when attempting the time tested, “hacking at the head with a blade,” too. With the blade left in the skull the monster may still attack effectively. It is well documented that a metal object logged in the brain may transfer electrical impulses from one hemisphere to the other while simultaneously sealing the wound. And while a human will suffer the ill effects of this confusion, a zed may not. A blade must be drawn out to completely sever and traumatize the brain. You’re not going to leave your weapon anyway, so go practice the Hew and Draw on a cantaloupe or something.
Crushing is a great way to assure most of the brain is ruined beyond function, but it is not weapon friendly. Crushing blows are dealt by heavy instruments, which are not suited for the Zombiclypse. Sporting goods can alleviate some of the weight whilst maintaining the ability to deliver devastating strikes, but these are not of battle grade and should be used as weapons of necessity. A great crushing tip is to knock the zombie down and violently stomp on its head. It’s gonna be messy, but it’ll get the job done. Must wear boots.
Complete and total removal of brain from body is the best bet and can be accomplished in many ways including shotgun blasts, explosives, sniping, and clean head separation. The positive is that all of these will instantly cause the body to cease in action. However, a cleanly severed head with brain intact is still a threat. Don’t get bitten by a stupid disembodied head. Get rid of that brain.
The final answer can only be, “As much as possible,” as to try for the least amount of damage is foolish and unpredictable. The brain is a remarkable machine capable of amazing resiliency and perseverance; attempt to raze it wholly. It’s also good to note that the brain is still somewhat of a scientific mystery. It’s gazillion functions have yet to be determined and duplicated, and thus it is dangerous as long as any part remains. This is doubly so for one suffering zombosis. The zombie brain can be a shifty beast, so handle with care… and extreme prejudice.
Recognize, Revitalize, Actionize.
Follow PopyclypseHero on Twitter
For more info:
Zombie Chow-Go vote
Top zombie iPhone games
H1N1 possibly helping zombie virus












Comments