Cremation... "It just makes sense"
Today I would like to extend my respect, admiration, approval, and general thumbs-up to a local Denver business. A local crematorium and funeral home (which has modestly chosen to remain anonymous) has shown remarkable initiative in the fight for zombie prevention. As an anti-zombie local business, they stand as an example to others by embracing that most important tenet of zombie prevention: "Organize before they rise."
The crematorium and funeral home has a billboard conveniently located on the corner of Federal Boulevard and Alameda which features a bold message. The sign reads, "CREMATION: IT JUST MAKES SENSE." And how right they are. Besides the obvious financial and practical motivations for cremation, it's also a sure-fire way to ensure that your loved ones don't rise from the dead to rend you limb from limb. No body, no zombie. In a world at constant risk of a zombie outbreak, cremation just makes sense.
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I really need to go to the grocery store and I really need to do some laundry. However, I seem to be stuck to my chair reading these wonderful zombie articles. I surely hope no zombie attack happens while I am reading or I will get eaten. My desk is in a corner and there is nowhere to run.......
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