Where to meet single young professionals in San Francisco

By Christine Cruz

Alanis Morisette once sang about a traffic jam when you’re already late, or a no smoking sign on your cigarette break. However, she forgot the biggest irony of all. Isn’t It Ironic, that in a large city like San Francisco, this is truly a “singles city” but many young professionals still complain that it is challenging meeting other singles that they actually “click” with… Don’t you think?

After talking to dozens of my single friends and colleagues in San Francisco and hearing funny stories about their quest for love, I was inspired. Here is a detailed guide of common places where you too can meet other eligible young single professionals in the city.

1.) Friends 

Back in the day when our parents did not have Match.com and got married in their early 20’s, they met other singles the traditional way: through friends. Today this is still the safest and most conventional way to meet other eligible bachelors and bachelorettes in the city. Think of your friends as a pipeline that generates great dating prospects and leads. They know you best, and what you look for. Don’t forget to tap into the resources of your married friends as well – many love to play matchmaker for their single friends.

2. Work

Dating a colleague is a “no-no” in the work place, but it happens. A company naturally hires people who fit into their corporate culture, which means that you will be working with people who share similar interests, lifestyles, and values as you. Given the amount of time you spend with your colleagues, travel with them, and have company-sponsored happy hours, it is not at all uncommon to have colleagues date or even get married. The only drawback to dating colleagues is that you will have to keep your relationship confidential from others, and if you do break things off, work can get extremely awkward and unpleasant. Use your common sense when dating colleagues. Trust your best judgment to see if it is worth risking your professional career over a romantic relationship.

3. Alumni associations

Throw on your college sweatshirt, cheer for your football or basketball team, and rock that alma mater pride! Alumni associations are a great way to meet single young professionals who share common ground with you. Better yet, attend alumni association events of your friends who went to other colleges so you can expand your network beyond your Ivy League, Big 10, Pac 10, or Division III schools.

4. Interest clubs

Whether your personal hobby is photography, investing, wine tasting, volunteering, or watering plants, joining clubs of your interest is a great way to meet like-minded individuals and other singles in the city. Hop on Craigslist and surf the “classes”, “groups” and “volunteering” sections to see what interesting clubs you can join in the city.

5. Sports clubs

Young professionals join the city’s sports clubs for various reasons. Some join soccer clubs as an outlet to relieve stress from their demanding jobs. Others lose a late Friday night bet with friends and are forced to sign up for the triathlon. But for most, young professionals join various sports and athletic clubs to join a community and feel a sense of belonging. Many of these sports groups throw socials, happy hours, and dinners for members to get to know each other. And more than likely, some couples begin dating. As Marathon Matt said, “I've seen numerous romances blossom. Honestly, this is as cool as seeing any of my runners conquer a half marathon."

6. San Francisco-only festivals and events

Minus LA’s weather, San Francisco’s young professionals are blessed with a multitude of non-stop weekends of summer festivals and events. (See my column, Why young professionals love living in San Francisco for details.) You’ve got events like Bay To Breakers, Union Street Festival, North Beach Festival, Haight Street Festival, Oyster & Beer Festival, Outside Lands, and wine events just to start off. This is a great opportunity to hang out with friends, and meet other singles in the city who love living in the city just as much as you do!

7. Online dating

If you have never been on an online dating site, remember this simple rule. Men, the photos you see of women are 5-10 years dated. And women, subtract 2-3 inches off a guy's height in his profile. As a single young professional in the city, you are confined to the people that you are friends with, work with, ride the muni with, work out at the gym with, and frequent the same bars with. Online dating allows you to cast a wider net in the dating pool and leverage technology to meet singles that you otherwise wouldn’t. San Francisco fortunately happens to be one of the only cities in the country where you can virtually "wink" to a friend whose user name is “SF_GreenEyes415”, a colleague whose turn-on is “Thunderstorms”, or a neighbor’s profile whose best feature is their “butt.” Everyone seems to be looking for love online in San Francisco. You’ve got Match.com, Eharmony.com, Chemistry.com, PerfectMatch.com, OKCupid.com, Craigslist, and BalboaCafeCougars.com. 

8. Speed dating

Movies like “The 40 Year Old Virgin” and “Hitch” glamorize speed dating in the big city. I have a male friend who frequents Asian Speed Dating events. (He’s white, and gets a lot of dirty looks from the Asian guys.) And 2 very close friends of mine met at a speed dating event. (Before the ding, he liked that she played tennis, she liked that he salsas.) So on a whim, my girlfriends and I signed up for a speed dating event thinking we would look as glamorous as Eva Mendez did in front of Will Smith. The real experience was nothing like the movies. There were 10 girls, and 10 guys. We had 6 minutes each to speak to each person and give our elevator dating pitch. This event drew the city’s most socially awkward bachelors, and I truly felt sorry for a lot of them. One guy said that he lived at home and his sisters made him sign up for the event. Another told me that he was there because he was lonely. I would recommend that you try it out at least once for the experience. It’ll be a great porch story for your grandchildren one day.

9. Grocery stores

Here in the city, there are jokes about the Marina “Dateway”, "GayWay" in the Castro, the wine aisle at Trader Joe’s, or Whole Foods aka “Whole Paycheck” being an ultimate pick-up spot for singles. They say that you can tell a lot about a person by what is in their basket. Does he have a 6 pack of beer and a super size bag of Doritos? Does she have a slice of bleu cheese and a bottle of Pinot? Does he have buckets of tofu and bundles of vegetables? Ask him to help you lift the 36-pack of water. Or ask her what the difference between a Shiraz and Syrah is. Either way, use this mundane, necessary, and boring chore of grocery shopping as an exciting opportunity to find a great date in the city.

10. Become a dog walker

My buddy borrows his friend's English bulldog every other weekend and walks the canine on Chestnut and Union Street to pick up women. I didn't believe him at first, so I grabbed a glass of Jovino Cafe sangria with him and the bulldog one Saturday afternoon and sure enough the ladies came swooning over! They walked by in their big sunglasses, came over to pet the pooch, and asked my friend dozens of questions (about the dog.) I am not sure if he's scored a date using this smooth tactic yet, but I must give him major brownie points for dating creativity.

11. Bars

I know married couples who met at a bar.  But for most of us, it is rare to meet "the One" at a bar when drinking is involved. Beer goggles lower your inhibition and make even the Average Joe look like Tom Brady, or Plain Jane a Megan Fox. You may end up thinking that you have amazing chemistry with someone that night, only to wonder later what you were thinking after that 5^th martini. So use your caution, and think with your proper head.

Don’t you think?