Fear of Publicity: Are you secretly wimpy?

November 7, 3:13 PMSF Marketing & P.R. ExaminerSusan Harrow

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I got an email from a woman who signed her missive "secretly wimpy," and went on to describe the fears that hold her back from becoming a more public person. I loved the tone of her writing and thought that many other people would like to hear about people like her who have great gifts to give the world, but who have reservations about "coming out" into the scary world at large. Here is our email exchange.

[I have] Fear of publicity: What do you suggest for a writer with a small ego and who abhors fame? My biggest fear would be getting ON the Oprah show. Can't I just be a well paid recluse? (I discovered my fear of public speaking years ago while getting a degree in PR!)

In journalism I was good at interviewing- off camera- so I realize it's a control issue. CNBC show encouraged me with your branding and sound bite suggestions, taking back control. My appearance is professional. I worked for years in sales and am outgoing and assertive in a small group, until I'm the center of attention. Please suggest which book I would best start with.

Signed,
Secretly Wimpy

P.S. please don't post my name on a blog!

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My Response:

You're not alone. I'm shy by nature and outgoing by training. And a lot of my clients are just like you. They are my favorites as they have great gifts to give the world. You can learn to be relaxed under pressure so you can be creative. It's a practice, just like writing.

1. Start with Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul.
2. Listen to the free teleclass how to become a soundbite genius. (The others would be good too, but this focuses on being public). 
3. Do you have speaking circles in your area? I suggest you start going.

Remember small steps consistently. It's all about training and practice so you can get comfortable under pressure.

Keep me posted on your progress. I'd like to hear about your process if you're willing to share. I promise to keep all of our correspondence confidential.

Warmly,
Susan

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Secretly Wimpy's Response

Thank you for your kind reply and encouraging words! I'm going to get the book today.

After I wrote the email I created two folders, one with your name on it (for your generous free downloads) and one with ideas on how to market/brand/promote myself.

I know my 'desire for success' vibration is being weakened by my 'privacy and anonymity desire', as well as my fear of public speaking. I needed some new downstream thoughts, such as success=calm, but where would I find this? My favorite Louise Hay card is "I am safe, it's only change," but it wasn't enough for the realities and pitfalls of media today. I just happened to turn on CNBC right before your segment was on-perfect alignment. I hadn't even intended to send you an email, I was just checking out the web site. Sending you the email was like stepping on a lurking excuse. I felt nervous excitement and relief. The journey was starting.

Sincerely,
(Wimpy, stepping out of the shadows)

P.S. I would be glad to keep you updated on my progress.

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My Response:

Without using your name, may I use what you've written for a blog post? I think a lot of people would benefit from your writing. You're funny and sweet and smart. I'll just call you "secretly wimpy".

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Secretly Wimpy's Response

I looked at your blogs http://www.huffingtonpost.com/susan-harrow http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-body-blog and found them insightful, delightful and bookmarkable, everything you teach.

I was able to get Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul from my library the first day. My mom went to pick it up for me and strangely never returned. I found her nose deep in the book, and she said, "You'll love it! I've been flipping through and everywhere I stopped it was good!" I concurred, and purchased my own copy for my permanent collection as I want to do a lot of underlining. It's wimpy approved recommended reading!

More info.
Download free audio teleclasses for the anyone who fears publicity or who wants to grow their media presence here.

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