Make your first date great

June 8, 3:14 PMDallas Dating ExaminerLeah Shafer

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By flick.com user banoootah_qtr

Having gone on somewhere between 50 and a hundred first dates in my Singledom career, I have learned a trick or two for making the good ones successful and the horrid ones end quickly.

So many folks get uber nervous about this experience, but if it’s done right, it’s just a fun little break from your day to visit with a new person. Here are my tips for a winning first date with anyone.

Don’t do dinner
Once upon a time, I went on a dinner date with someone I had met online. We clicked all over the place via e-mail, but in person, had almost nothing to say to each other. It was a long, boring two hours.

A first date should be short. An hour, tops. This is your chance to dip your toe in the pool of a relationship and see how the water feels.

You’re more likely to have positive feelings about the experience if it is a meeting for drinks or coffee. If it’s awful, you can escape. If it’s fabulous, you can plan another meeting later in the week and look forward to it.

Share appropriately
This is not the time to spill your guts about the botched plastic surgery you had two years ago. Nor is it appropriate to talk about money, religion, or any of your exes. Keep the conversation light—hobbies, recent trips, job, friends.

Make plans for after
If you have a dating disaster on your hands, you’ll want something fun to do after and you’ll need an excuse to run for the hills. Plan to meet a friend for dinner to dish on the experience. If the date was fantastic, you can enjoy sharing that information, too.

Keep expectations in check
This is a first date. You are probably not going to fall madly in love, but you might have butterflies if it’s a good one. It’s just a person sitting across from you and you’re just having a friendly conversation. Nothing less, nothing more.

Plan the next date—or give the polite brush-off
If you had a great time, be sure to say something specific, like, “We should get together for dinner next week. When are you free?” If there was no connection, don’t lead the person on and act like you want to see him or her again—that’s just rude. Simply say, “As much as I enjoyed this date, I am not sure I feel like we made a big connection. Thank you for meeting me, though.” It’s that easy.