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Reviewing the Plaxico Burress case
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It's a pretty funny thing to picture.
The million-dollar hands that once cradled one of the most memorable passes in Super Bowl history fumbling around in a pair of sweatpants trying to capture a runaway illegal firearm and balance a top-shelf alcoholic beverage at the same time.
Well, maybe funny isn’t the right word. Let’s go with disturbing.
What happened to Giants star wide receiver Plaxico Burress in the midtown New York club Latin Quarter Nov. 25 was just the beginning of one of the most disturbingly funny NFL tales ever told – ok, that’s better.
It is a tale that will most likely go down with the Michael Vick saga as one of the most disappointing as well.
To claim these accounts as fact might be folly, but here is a rundown of the events following the shooting according to reports first published by the New York Post.
Burress took his gun from the Midtown club where workers never called authorities and even cleaned up afterward. After limping to his vehicle he spent about 90 minutes making frantic calls to figure out where his wound could be discreetly treated. After settling on New York-Cornell Hospital,Plax gave his name as Harris Smith, saying he'd been shot at an Applebee's restaurant. Nonetheless, hospital workers recognized him as Plaxico Burress, sources said, and the gunshot was not reported, as required by law.
Another confusing aspect of the story was that Burress’ sidearm was reportedly discovered by security but the club owner allowed him to carry it into the VIP. Plax told the night club owner that he was toting the firearm for protection.
Protection from what you ask? Well, Burress was said to be wearing an inordinately expensive amount of jewelry and feared he might be robbed. Amazing I know, and the beat goes on.
These misadventures and misfires will likely play out in court in the near future, so for now let’s get look at the facts as we know them.
Burress was arraigned in a Manhattan criminal court, charged with two separate counts of criminal possession of a handgun in the second degree. He faces a mandatory sentence of 3½ years in state prison, with a maximum of 15 years, on each count.
Aside from the criminal charges, Burress could find himself unemployed, as the NFL forbids players from owning unregistered handguns, and the Giants certainly aren’t taking any chances.
Big Blue fined and suspended him for four games, the rest of the regular season. The team also placed Burress on the reserve non-football injury list for conduct detrimental to the team, which means he won't be back for the playoffs, either.
Burress' base salary this season is $3.5 million and as he will not be paid for the remaining games of the 17-week schedule, the slick- handed wide out stands to lose $823,529 in game checks, not including the hefty fines, revoked signing bonuses and legal fees to come.
But on a more positive note, if I had to guess I’d say he got into the nightclub for free, the gun only set him back a couple of Benjamins and DC Sports sources are still trying to confirm the reports of a used Applebees gift card. Whew, saved some money there, dodged that bullet.
Now if we could only put a price on our decisions, right Plax?
I swear there is a Master Card commercial somewhere in this calamity: The decision to be a gun-toting wannabe thug moron instead of a successful NFL centerpiece —priceless.
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