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_67280_2009-10-28-10-44-47.055.JPG "Pittsburgh TV Examiner")
How To Watch TV 101
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Our favorite pastime
So when the powers that be at the Examiner suggested each person write a basic column about their respective topic (Whatever 101), my first thought was that TV watching is so basic, how could I possibly come up with something interesting? TV has been around for over 50 years and describing how to watch it would be akin to Richard Hayden (David Spade) and Tommy Callahan (Chris Farley) explaining how to buckle a seatbelt to airline passengers in Tommy Boy:
"And...what about seat belts? To fasten, take the little end and stick it in the big end and...you know what? If you guys don't know how to use a seatbelt, just ring your call button and Tommy will come back there and hit you on the head with a tack hammer because you are a retard."
TV watching is pretty simplistic, yes?
Well, as I thought about it more, it really isn't.
Yes, if you want to be extremely basic about it, it's really just plopping yourself down in front of a screen, turning on the TV and enjoying.
However, TV viewing has changed dramatically since many of us were kids.
For years, we had the big three networks--ABC, CBS and NBC. Prime time was 8pm-11pm and our choices were limited. And if we missed Fantasy Island on Saturday nights at 10? Well, we were pretty much out of luck unless we caught the summer reruns. Even then, we'd have to scan the weekly TV guide in the rare hopes of locating that one particular episode that, let's face it, would be long forgotten as the months rolled by.
Now if you miss a show, you have ample opportunity to watch it! You can record it on the DVR and watch it minutes after it's over (or even during if you happen to be there and don't want to wait). Or, you can click your mouse, type in the site name and go straight to the website (usually available the next day) to watch it. Even Hulu has offerings from many of the major networks as does iTunes. And, of course, there's always the "on demand" feature from cable companies and dish networks.
Or, if you prefer to catch a whole season because you might not have a particular network (like Showtime for Dexter or HBO for True Blood), you can purchase the entire season on DVD and watch the episodes in one sitting.
Not one to watch TV on a smaller computer screen? That's ok, you can link your computer to your home entertainment system and watch it on a giant LCD or plasma screen with booming surround sound! Then again, you can catch it on the go on your phone in a miniature version by downloading it and watching it while traveling.
And remember prime time? Well, it still technically exists, but with the explosion of cable channels, you have literally hundreds of programs to choose from at any given time. Catch Guy Fieri traveling the country looking for the best eateries on Diners, Drive-ins and Dives on the Food Network while recording The First 48 on A&E and downloading a season of Showtime's Californication on your iPhone.
The possibilities are endless. In fact, this is just a brief example of how you can watch TV in the modern age. I didn't even include online shows like The Guild and the many other series being produced today.
Come to think of it, the How To Watch TV 101 crash course now has to be expanded. I wonder if there's money, fame and fortune in scheduling advanced level and graduate courses in TV Watching?
**Note: Idea for credited courses in TV Watching patent pending. ;)
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