Transformers 3: 'More emotion, less action'? Huh?

November 3, 2:08 PMPop Culture ExaminerCollin Parker

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WANTED: For implying he's going gooey
(®Touchstone)

So Michael Bay fancies himself a touchy-feely filmmaker. Dear lord.

According to a 'secret video' embedded within the Blu-ray edition of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Bay is looking at making the third installment a little more 'emotional', spending at least part of the time exploring the relationship between Sam and Bumblebee.

Emotional? Relationships? In a Michael Bay movie?

But that's not the worst part.

He also says, "it's not going to be just about action, action, action."

Wha? Huh?

Look, the whole reason Michael Bay films exist is to give audiences a two (and 1/2) hour escape from all the issues of everyday life. Things blow up. People die. Robots transform. Megan Fox wears tank tops.

It's right there in the Bible: "And Michael Bay said, 'Let there be explosions.' And there were explosions. And they were good."

Am I missing something?

Michael Bay is the best at what he does, and Revenge of the Fallen was well worth the price of admission. But there's no place in it for relationships, emotional depth, or hugging.

Mike (can I call you 'Mike'?), If you want to get all gooey (a tactic which, arguably, you already failed at in Armageddon) don't go doing it in a movie about robots that turn into cars.

Go ahead and take a stab at Schindler's List 2, if you want-- it wouldn't be the worst idea to come down the pike. (The geniuses behind the Short Circuit remake have that well-covered.)

Just keep the Transformers movies the way they should be: big, loud, and crazy. And if you still need some advice on how to make the third movie better...

Four words: Ditch Mudflap and Skids.