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Or else what, you ask? Yet another tantrum by a 'fan' threatening to tear up tickets that he may or may not have, throw them into the virtual trash, and go root for some other team?
Nah. You know me better than that. I've been around here way too long for that nonsense.
But I've also been around here long enough to know that the nonsense we're seeing on the football field needs to stop. And tomorrow at Jacksonville is as good a time as any.
No more excuses. Will you please man up and win a friggin game already? The Jags are beatable - just like the Titans were last week.
- The Jags are a 51 yard with time expiring Josh Scobee FG away from being 0-3
- The Jags defense is 14th overall - not the brick wall they used to be
- The Jags have some key players out including starting offensive linemen Chris Naeole and Brad Meester, and FS Reggie Nelson. They recently lost backup corner Scott Starks for the season
- Texans castoff Milford Brown is starting for them at right guard for crying out loud
The Jags will however, smash you in the face on both sides of the ball. They put up over 400 yards on the Bob Sanders-less Colts last week with both Fred Taylor and MJD going over 100 yards. They held the ball for an amazing 41:35 time of possession.
Yet, they are not satisfied with their offense, mainly due to the same red zone ineptness that has plagued the Texans and a lack of big plays. Jags offensive coordinator Dirk Koetter 'guarantees' that the Jags offense will improve this week - and it just so happens that WR Jerry Porter will return to the lineup. Are you ready, Jacques and Fred?
With Porter on the shelf, alleged coke head Matt Jones has emerged as quarterback David Garrard's favorite target.
Yeah, it probably wasn't his nose candy. It just happened to be under that credit card he was holding as he went through the drive through at one of the 10,000 Waffle Houses in Jax at 3 a.m. Or was he in Arkansas? Oh well - doesn't matter.
Anyway, it would seem that the game plan here would be to put 8 in the box and challenge David Garrard to beat you over the top. Be careful what you ask for since that might just happen.
As far as win or else:
- Win or else you'll be 0-3 and at the peak of the Mt. Everest of discussion when the subject of "worst teams in the NFL" comes up.
- Win or else the heat on Richard Smith's backside will (hopefully) be turned up to broil.
- Win or else your fan base will be greet you not with bags over their heads but disguised as empty blue seats for your painfully long awaited home opener against the Colts next week.
Someone or something needs to slap this franchise upside the head and shake them out of this perpetual funk. A switch needs to be flipped. Something. Anything.
If I was the Texans media guys, I'd be showing the old hockey movie Slapshot [warning: NSFW/language] on the team flight just to get them in the right mindset. I think Matt Schaub sucker punching Drayton Florence during pre-game warm ups would be just what the doctor ordered. Edit: And in a very odd and sad coincidence, I turn to CNN after writing this and I hear about the passing of Paul Newman. RIP Paul.
Some have said they want the Texans defense to establish an identity. Well, they have one. I call it the "read, react, keep everything in front of you, and whatever you do, don't take it to them before they take it to you" defense.
It's not just the defense that frustrates.
The Texans offense is designed like this precision machine in that if one thing is out of tolerance or one part doesn't get its routine maintenance, the whole machine doesn't work.
It's like the old space program joke about NASA spending millions on the development of a pen that works in micro gravity so the astronauts can take notes, etc., while on-orbit conducting experiments. The pens were not reliable and couldn't get ink to the tip because of the zero g like environment, so NASA spent millions more on problem resolution, lessons learned, re-design and testing while assuring taxpayers that they were working very hard to fix the problem.
The Russians use pencils.
I'm all for pencils and duct tape at this point. Screw precision. Smash someone in the face and play football.
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