Big Goof and Little Goof decide the Senate race in Minnesota

December 26, 9:32 AMSouth St. Paul ExaminerRob Shirk

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Voting in Minnesota

First, a children's story. 

Big Goof and Little Goof got up one day and put on each other's clothes by mistake. Big Goof thought he was growing at an enormous rate, Little Goof thought he was shrinking as fast as can be. They were baffled, frightened, and confused.

That is but one of three short children's stories of Big Goof and Little Goof. There has been an addition to the saga.

One day Big Goof and Little Goof got up to vote in the elections in Minnesota. Not knowing that they had to follow directions that were designed for a third grader to understand, they voted any old way they wanted, some of the names on the ballots were scribbled on, the ovals that were to be filled in were ignored and blobs were colored to the side of them and sometimes they voted for BOTH! It was great fun!

The senate recount between Landslide Coleman and Landslide Franken is being decided by ballots filled out by imbeciles and idiots. Karen Harper our Birmingham Examiner, has a few thoughts on this, as well. Our forefathers had a great debate on whether the common people had the sense to run a government. The aristocracy, who could read and write and reason, should be the ones to have the power to rule was one side of the argument. The common man won and has proved that the land can prosper and achieve greatness. There are exceptions.

Minneapolis bumped Seattle to second place this year to reclaim the No. 1 spot in a ranking called America's Most Literate Cities -  USA Today

Oh my goodness, what does this say about the rest of the country? The ballots that are under contention are predominately from the Twin Cities of Minneapolis and St. Paul. At least St. Paul gets a break, kind of. It is not listed as number one or two. At least we get a break, here on the east side, of being brain dead to the point that we can't fill out an election ballot. Or do we?

But St. Paul is the rising star. St. Paul has climbed steadily, from 11th place in 2003 to third place this year.
More than many cities, St. Paul residents show evidence of stable or increased literate behaviors, be it reading newspapers or magazines, going online, library use, or buying books from a local bookstore - researcher Jack Miller president of Central Connecticut State University in New Britain.

So here we are, the most literate metropolitan area in the country, running circles around the so-called high brow intellects of Boston and San Francisco, and we wind up leaving the race for a seat in the United States Senate to our most proud citizens of the most literate cities of Minneapolis and St. Paul to Big Goof and Little Goof, filling out ballots as if they were finger painting in pre-school.

I fear for the Republic.