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You are now entering the Friend Zone
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More feared than the morning after a night of binge drinking. More dreaded than the end of the 08 fiscal year financial reports; It’s the Friend Zone. Every guy on the planet has entered this God-forsaken place. And all of us regret it. 
But some guys make more frequent visits than others. What is it that causes some men to repeatedly get caught in the massive gravitational pull of the Friend Zone? Well guys, it’s all about first impressions.
I have a good buddy who is a pretty successful entertainment executive. He’s charming, funny, and makes a good living. But I’d estimate that nine out of ten times he ends up getting classified as a potential boy-friend instead of a boyfriend. Ever since I’ve known him, he’s had to live life as the bridesmaid and never the bride. But it wasn’t until recently that I discovered his fatal dating flaw: he’s too friendly!
I know it sounds strange. I mean, of course you want to be friendly; especially when you meet a hot woman. But we live in a social environment in which friendly equals friend. A guy can be coy, cool, mysterious, outgoing. He can be anything as long as he’s not friendly! Allow me to explain.
Women spend their whole lives being approached by, and then evaluating, potential mates. As a result of all the practice, a woman learns how to make quick decisions about a potential suitor. Within a matter of seconds, she has to decide whether or not the guy she’s speaking with is “worthy” of her phone number.
Guys, this is where we make our biggest mistake. We worry so much about putting our best foot forward during that initial conversation, that many of us forget the hook! When we first meet a woman, the hook is what we need to reel her in. Just like a movie needs a plot twist and a song needs a chorus, a guy needs a hook.
Without a hook, the average woman will immediately recognize two things. First, she’ll note that you’re a good guy. Second, she’ll determine that you have nothing new or interesting to offer her. But because you’re a nice guy, she feels socially obligated to let you down easy; thus the Friend Zone.
So here are some sensible tips to help you steer clear of the Friend Zone.
- Always have a hook. This is not an invitation to use a corny pickup line. A hook should flow naturally from conversation. It can be something that you both have in common, an interesting and true comment about an observation you’ve made (about her or the surroundings), or your hook can even be a funny, yet smart-aleck remark.
- Be a gentleman, not a pushover. Pushovers become friends or worse yet, they become doormats.
- Make your intentions clear. Let her know that upfront that you’d like to be more than just friends. But be careful not to propose right out of the box. You get the drift.
- Be cognizant of your body language. Women are like sharks. They can smell the chum(p) in the water. So stand tall and stay loose.
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