You wouldn't think it'd be hard to make a good surf movie. Show us some good waves, tell some stories and feature plenty of good wipeouts, and we're hooked.
Seems easy enough, right? Yet, so many surf movies really suck.
Needless to say, they can't all be "Endless Summer." Yet, some are really, REALLY bad.. I've analyzed this and come up with a few reasons why bad surf movies suck so much:
1.) Hack film makers
To be rather blunt, some meathead surfers figure they’ll make films just so they won’t have to get real jobs. And don't get me wrong -- not having a real job is a noble goal. But the thing is, untrained filmmakers usually make crappy movies. Merely shooting videos of your buddies while in Thailand doesn't cut it.
2.) Surf porn
No, I don't mean that kind of porn. I'm talking about those films that feature wave after wave with no regard for story or ambiance. Like a porn, after a while you're like, "Is this it?"
3.) Awful music.
I realize the licensing makes it too expensive to get music from Jimi Hendrix. But come on. There are plenty of good struggling musicians who could help. And we’re not talking about crummy nu metal bands that make you want to punch a wall.
4.) Meathead surfers.
Just as I don't want meatheads making surf movies, I don't want to watch meatheads in the movie. In fact, I'd like to see movies with fewer hall of famers and more regular people that I can relate to.
Okay, whew.Thanks for hearing my rant. Tomorrow I'll take the more positive approach and talk about really good surf movies.