Things Surfers Like

September 16, 9:28 AMSurf ExaminerPat Pemberton

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Someone once said, "Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery -- until you get sued by a high-priced attorney for intellectual property rights, beat the case because it lacked merit but nonetheless wind up having to dish out thousands in legal fees, forcing you to sell both your house and the big screen TV."

Okay, so maybe I said that. Just now, in fact.

But, you know, at some point, everything is derivative. In fact, the Barenaked Ladies said it best when they sang "It's All Been Done," which, loosely translated, means it's all been done.*

I say all of this not because I'm making some point about intellectual property rights or because I really dig BNL. I say it because I'm about to steal someone's idea, and I want to make it seem like it's ok to do that kind of thing.

You know that web site Stuff White People Like?

It's pretty funny, huh? So funny the guy actually parlayed it into a book deal. And now he's laughing all the way to the bank -- which, by the way, is also something white people like.

But I was looking at the book the other day, and I said: "Hey -- this sounds more like it should be called "Stuff Liberal White People Like." And then, after a bit of pontification, I thought, "Hey -- I should STEAL this idea for my surf blog and create a list of Stuff Surfers Like!" 

And then, finally, I said, "Why am I talking to myself?" And then I added, "About white people?"

Anyway, my point is, starting today, I'm going to occasionally (a.k.a., "until I run out of ideas") list some stuff surfers like. Except, to ward off lawyers, I'll call it Things Surfers Like.

So without any further adieu, here's my first Thing Surfers Like:

DUKE KAHANAMOKU

Kahanamoku was an Olympic swimmer, who popularized modern surfing, once saved the lives of eight men at sea and yadda, yadda, ho hum. But you don't need to concern yourself with all those hard-to-remember facts. You just need to occasionally drop the name "Duke" in a sentence.

Example: "Let's paddle out for Duke!"

If someone -- some ignoramus -- asks you who Duke is, cluck your tongue, roll your eyes and in an irritated voice say, "Dude -- are you kidding me?"

* By the way, I stole that line from myself.

Photo: Library of Congress