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Well, there’s spam bacon sausage and spam

November 15, 12:29 PM
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The list is seemingly endless, but yet still growing with each day’s news: Lehman Brothers, Circuit City, Linens-n-Things, Sharper Image and many others are all securely atop the dead and dying business heap with the America car makers apparently hot on their heels.

But the Austin, Minnesota-based Hormel Foods Corporation has seen a steady rise in sales of late, thanks to its gelatinous canned meat product, Spam.

In the Hormel factory, two shifts of workers have been cranking out the colorful meat product seven days a week.

Spam – made from ham, pork, sugar, salt, water, potato starch and sodium nitrate (the source of the appetizing pink color) - was born in the throes of the Great Depression, and seems to be one of those foods that thrives in bad economic times.

A spokesman for the food industry told the New York Times that pancake mixes, instant potatoes, macaroni and cheese, Jell-O, Kool-Aid, Velveeta (the Spam of the cheese world) and beer were among the food/beverage products that see steady sales increases during ‘hard times.’

As a public service, the Strange News Department has dug up – much like Bubba from Forrest Gump – a few recipe options for the vaccum-packed, infinite shelf-life meat product that costs just about $2.50 for a 12-ounce can.

There’s the Enchilada Breakfast Casserole with Spam, whipping cream, tomatoes, eggs and onions and the Cornbread Broccoli Spam Pie.

How about the Cabbage Apple Spam Supper with, well, cabbage, apples and Spam, and the Cool Cucumber Avocado Spam Sandwich with cream cheese, sour cream, dillweed and Spam.

And of course there’s the recipe for homemade Spam: get one whole pig, throw it in a blender, add salt and dye and wait a couple days for it to coagulate.

Buuuurp.

     

Spam, spam, spam, spam, wonderful spam found here.

Author: J. Doug Gill
J. Doug Gill is a National Examiner. You can see J. Doug's articles on J. Doug's Home Page.
Find out more about J. Doug:
J. Doug has spent more than a quarter century living by the adage: if you want to make a million dollars as a freelance writer, start with two million. He resides in Maryland, where the state General Assembly has constitutionally banned common sense.
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