RSS
Home
Divorce, change and acknowledging your progress
Print
Email
RSS
Subscribe
Image @ intrachange.com.au
Related Articles
- http://www.examiner.com/x-5939-Divorce-Support-Examiner~y2009m7d10-Divorce-Getting-to-know-yourself-again
- http://www.examiner.com/x-5939-Divorce-Support-Examiner~y2009m7d24-Divorce-Youre-merely-a-book-store-away-from-resolution-and-recovery
- http://www.examiner.com/x-5939-Divorce-Support-Examiner~y2009m7d24-Divorce-and-dating-101-on-the-issue-of-taking-risks
- http://www.examiner.com/x-5939-Divorce-Support-Examiner~y2009m7d2-Divorce-recovery-and-the-symptoms-of-inner-peace
Let’s face it, Divorce like any type of change, is difficult. Often, when we make broad sweeping changes, our self esteem also gets a bit “roughed up”, because old beliefs are being challenged. All that we knew, may no longer be “familiar” or “acceptable”. When we make large strides in our lives, whether it be changes as the result of a divorce, or any type of change, we need to take time out, recognize our progress, make certain we “stop and smell the roses” along the way and celebrate our advancement. In doing so, we regain that lost sense of “self” and “self esteem”, by taking the time to acknowledge our accomplishments.
Divorcetransitions.com, authors a didactic article about how to go about rebuilding your self-esteem both post Divorce or any type of change. It defines the magnitude of change a Divorce has upon us in stating:
“Most people going through the divorce process feel weighed down by negatives...an extreme sense of failure, sadness over lost dreams, and a paralyzing case of "If only I would have..." Those thoughts are pointless, depressing and probably wrong. It happened. Now it's time to begin rebuilding your tattered self esteem.”
Rebuilding Your Self Esteem indicates there are “six easy steps” to regaining your self esteem:
Set one realistic goal for yourself each week. In high stress periods this may be nothing more than eating three fairly nutritious meals a day. In more moderate periods it may involve signing up for an enjoyable evening class or joining a divorce support group.
Keep a "Thumbs Up" journal. Every day write down something positive about yourself. On good days that might include the completion of a successful ad campaign at work. In more challenging times it may simply be that you have nice eyebrows! These notations can be things you're good at, have accomplished, or that are simply part of you. Set a specific time of the day to write in your journal, and don't skip a day!
Compliment someone else. Make it a sincere compliment - not a phony one. How often have you thought: nice dress, or good work, or you've got a great smile, or you're such a good dad? Well, don't just think it, say it. Making someone else feel good always has a boomerang effect!
Honor the Positives. List the reasons you're a great human being. (If that phrase made you wince, you may need help with your list!) Include things you do well, like gardening, auto repair, software development, writing, child care, weaving, and so forth. Use the following qualities as a springboard and add your own:
Athletic Cheerful
Compassionate Courteous
Dependable Empathetic
Encouraging to Others Energetic
Ethical Firm Friend
Free-spirited Funny
Generous Gentle
Giving Helpful
Honorable Intelligent
Inventive Kind
Loving Musical
Nurturing Optimistic
Peacekeeper Physically Fit
Practical Reliable
Resourceful Thoughtful
Develop and repeat affirmation several times a day. Use the following and go on to make up others that apply specifically to you:
- I am a deeply good and loving person.
- I'm as important as everybody else. (Sometimes it's very hard to convince yourself of that!)
- I am capable of handling my own life.
- I am a loveable person.
- I am strong enough to ask for help when I need it.
Accept that you are NOT the mother or father of the world. It's not your responsibility to make everyone else happy all the time. In the first place, you can't make anyone else content. In the second, nobody appointed you God. (I'll bet you never thought of it that way, did you?)”
While recovery from a divorce may tend to be complicated, the above suggested steps certainly sound easy enough and would certainly motivate and encourage one to continue to move forward with their efforts at improving.
So, what are you waiting for? Take some time out to recognize yourself for a job well done by treating yourself as you deserve to be treated. To stay stagnant is easy, but to change is difficult. The act, alone, should garner its own recognitions. Wouldn’t you agree?
“Sometimes it’s the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.” – Keri Russell.
All Articles are © of Corinne Isaacs-Frontiero – All Rights Reserved.
For more information or to see Corinne's articles in their entirety, please visit Corinne's Home Page @ www.Examiner.com.
Check out Corinne's website, also: www.booksonrelationships.net, or become a member of Motown Writers Network.
Related Articles:
Add a Comment
.jpg)
