Top 6: great games on failed consoles

October 26, 10:38 AMPittsburgh Video Game ExaminerEric Keihl

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Good taste prevails again!

The landscape of video game history is, as everyone knows, littered with the sad remains of consoles which just couldn't quite keep afloat for one reason or another. The real tragedy of these failed systems is that they usually had at least one truly excellent game that, since the console tanked so horribly, few people ever got to play. Since I am, as always, a loyal servant of justice and fairness, I'd like to take this opportunity to help bring attention to the best of these electronic orphans by presenting my list of the Top 6 Great Games on Failed Consoles.

6. Splatterhouse (Turbografx-16)

Here's a pop quiz: what happens when a console with comparatively little third-party support gets sandwiched between the Sega Genesis and the Super Nintendo in its North American release date? If you answered "it gets utterly crushed," then you're absolutely right. But while its timing might be described as unfortunate (and its spelling described as substandard,) the Turbografx-16 produced a few decent games, including Splatterhouse, a charming, grisly little beat-em-up that had college student Rick (winner of the Jason Vorhees look-alike contest,) gorily dismembering the monsters that took his girlfriend with guns, cleavers, and good old-fashioned two-by-fours. It even came with a warning on the box reading "The horrifying theme of this game may be inappropriate for young children... and cowards." Can't beat that for advertising

5. Virtual Boy Wario Land (Nintendo Virtual Boy)

The Virtual Boy is definitely the blackest of the black eyes Nintendo has inflicted upon itself over the years: it had a paltry library of games, the black-and-red color scheme brought on headaches and eyestrain, and its ungainly size stretched the definition of "portable" well beyond acceptable limits. But at least it had Virtual Boy Wario Land, a solid platformer that let you control the mustachioed villain as he gathers up the riches of an underground labyrinth. By picking up various hats (of all things,) players could switch between a variety of useful power-ups, from flamethrowing to flight. True, it didn't make great use of the Virtual Boy's 3D gimmick, but then again neither did any of the other games for the system, so there you go.

4. Alien vs. Predator (Atari Jaguar)

While its sequels are probably better known, the original Alien vs. Predator game on Atari's buggy atrocity of a system deserves a lot of respect for being one of the most innovative FPS' ever made. It gave you a choice of three races (Alien, Predator, and human) and each made for a completely different experience: Aliens were a mêlée powerhouse, humans relied on guns and maneuverability, and the Predator used a cloaking device to dispatch enemies undetected. If the Jaguar had had more games like Alien vs. Predator, and fewer like White Man Can't Jump, it might actually have stood a chance against the Playstation and N64. Alas, 'twas not so, and Atari itself perished shortly thereafter.

3. Sonic CD (Sega CD)

I think everyone will agree that Sega made a lot of poor choices with it's consoles, and one of the worst was not letting the Genesis die with a little dignity when the 16-bit generation came to a close. Instead, they tried to drag out it's lifespan with a CD attachment, and the result was a commercial failure of epic proportions. Ironically enough, though, this first of many low points in the history of Sega was the absolute pinnacle of its most storied mascot, Sonic the Hedgehog. Not only did Sonic CD offer all of the insane speed and twitchy platforming action that gamers had come to expect, it also threw in an awesome time travel mechanic that made every playthrough a little different. From there, of course, it's been mostly downhill for both Sonic and Sega, but that's a story for another day.

2. Metal Slug (Neo Geo AES)

SNK's Neo Geo home console taught the video game industry a very important lesson: no matter how far ahead of the pack your console is graphically, nobody's going to buy it if you charge 600 bucks for it. At least, it tried to teach that lesson; apparently the executives at Sony weren't paying any attention. In any case, the dismal sales stemming from the high price point doesn't change the fact that the Neo Geo had a number of great games, my personal favorite being the shoot-em-up Metal Slug. While it might be described as a Contra clone due to the wide variety of gun powerups, one-hit-deaths, and epic boss fights, Metal Slug set itself apart with its its cartoony grahpics, quirky sense of humor, and absolutely perfect controls. Best of all, unlike the other games in this countdown, it's been heavily anthologized on more successful consoles, meaning that the current generation of gamers can appreciate it's brilliance without having to shell out a small fortune on eBay.

1. Skies of Arcadia (Sega Dreamcast)

Oh, the Dreamcast. The failure that never should have been. To this day, I sometimes have trouble understanding how such an excellent system could have tanked so horribly, especially with a library of games that might be the most consistently above-average in the history of the industry. While it was hard to single out just one great title on this tragically fallen system, Skies of Arcadia's brilliant blend of RPG exploration and strategic ship-to-ship combat, set in a unique game world where humanity is confined to islands floating in the sky, are enough to crack my all-time Top 10 list and earn the #1 spot in this countdown. The only downside to listing all of the fun things you get to do in the game (discovering strange new relics, building your crew, playing mini-games on your VMU, and so forth,) is that it always reminds me that the game has gone almost a full decade without a sequel. What a shame.