The Last First Day

From the mis-matched socks that lead to tears on the first day of kindergarten to the stomach-ache of knowing that I am now a senior, going back to school has always been somewhat turbulent. Why this is, I’m not sure. But what hit me with overwhelming force just one week ago was this thought:

I’ve had my last first day of school.

Now, rather than blubber through a post about how the nerd that I am will miss shiny new school supplies, the point I am making is that each year we “go back to school,” we make a mark. Slowly but surely, we pencil another line on the figurative height chart of life, growing and seeing the progress we’ve made from a year before. Though this year, my transition means a lot of things: back to America, accepting that it’s the last time to start fall classes, having courses in English–there are transitions going on for all sorts of grades and ages.

Whatever your “last” thing, keep this in mind: it is only in the realization that some part of life is passing that we come to fully appreciate it. Without the end or the finality that so often accompanies life’s experiences, do we not lose that luster that make them unique? For me, whether it was a friendship, relationship, or relationship with a country, the molding and shaping of what someone or some place meant to me was finally cast into permanence after some sort of transition or trial. It is the difficulty that puts the joy into relief, though we may only feel a little relief at the time.

Alors, today, savor whomever or whatever it is in your life. Let a moment wash over you without letting the dark, nagging question of “And tomorrow?” snatch you away. Relish in where you are: freshman, sophomore, junior, senior, highschool student, grown-up, almost-grown-up…and you’ll see just how beautiful it is even when it ends.