A New Year, a renewal of your relationship

January 1, 11:04 AMRelationship ExaminerKristen Houghton

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The beginning of a new year seems to jumpstart life for everyone. The holidays are over, Spring is just around the corner, changes need to be made in our lives. We make those awful New Year’s resolutions, which barely last through the month of January. 

We've all been a victim of resolutions and I can’t count how many I’ve personally broken. This year, instead of making resolutions to “lose those damn ten pounds, get up at five and exercise, or take that music class you’ve wanted to take for years” decide instead to renew your intentions instead of resolve a whole set of new ones.

Renewal is better than resolutions because the word renewal has more flexibility.

 So…..renew your commitment to eat better and well but not necessarily diet.

Exercise more, but not at the ungodly hour of five A.M.

Check out a music teacher whose weekly lessons you will try to fit into your schedule.

But the best renewal idea of all is the resolve to renew your relationship by “dating” your man.

If you remember what first attracted you to your mate, you will also remember how much fun it was to go on dates with him. The time spent getting ready for a date, the anticipation of waiting to see this person at your door, the thrill of holding hands, the joy that just being together meant for you, the sweetness of a kiss. How magical!

Over the years we tend to take for granted the person who has become our mate; it’s natural. Daily life takes over and we are lucky if we get to spend more than a half hour with each other, forget about holding hands or anything else! It is miraculous if we can get a quick goodnight kiss before we zonk out from our exhausting days. As for anticipating the appearance of our mate at the door, it is more likely to be because we need him to do something rather than just the excitement of seeing him! This is life.

This year I will begin to do what I did in the past, when my guy and I  were dating. To be sure, it will be done with more money at our disposal since we’re not the “cash-deprived, parent-dependent” college kids we were when we met. Then it was pizza and cuddling in the car, talking about our dreams. Now it can be a great meal at a favorite restaurant and going to the theatre or even away for a weekend.

But, it can also be somethng as simple as just going for walks and holding hands the same way we did “back in the day.” A drive to a favorite spot and stopping for ice cream, a walk on the beach to watch the sunset. Whatever it is, it will be being together and showing our love to each other.

Relationships need renewal. It is a living representation of your love for each other. Renewing your love is giving it new life.

So along with other “renewal” efforts to eat better, exercise more, take a music class, and cook healthier meals, try to renew your relationship. Making time for each other, sharing new dreams together, going on “dates,” and remembering the excitement of how you made each other feel, and still do, are all part of the renewal.

Love is a magical thing and it has a special magic. Renew your lives together! Happy (re)New(al) Year!

***

© 2008 all rights reserved Kristen Houghton 

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