Sex for promotion in the workplace - Everything’s Personal, Nothing’s Sacred

October 15, 7:16 PMRelationship ExaminerKristen Houghton

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She’s talented, attractive, and knows more about what makes her department run and run well than anyone else who works there, including her boss. Yet this woman didn’t get the position of supervisor for which she applied for one simple reason: She doesn’t sleep around.  

Sound like something out of the 1950’s based series “Mad Men?” ? Fast forward more than 50 years and, unfortunately, it is still a very real problem for women in 2009.

“I know exactly why I didn’t get the position,” says this outraged woman. “I knew it even during  the interview. My boss wasn't interested in my qualifications; I had a gut instinct that he had already chosen who he wanted working with him. The woman who did get the position got it because she knows  exactly what she is doing.  And by that I mean she knows that having sex with the boss guarantees she will get what she wants. She’s not the first. It happens here all the time, in the workplace.”

It also happens everywhere else. It is a time-honored ploy: Play "nice" with the man in charge and you can basically write your own ticket at work. We're not saying Brooke Hundley got a position because she slept with Steve Philips but...

I have a friend who left a 6 figure job because of the promiscuous behavior of fellow employees in the workplace.  She's not a prude by any stretch of the imagination yet her work environment became untenable. She had to leave because, as she told me,

"I have never work in such an immoral place in my entire career. They partied on week-ends and carried over to the office on Monday. No one seemed to care."

It isn't even just a problem for women either it seems. Men are as likely to be overlooked if they don't play the game with a woman in charge.

" I had worked really hard and was up for a promotion. Two weeks after I didn't get it I found out that the guy who was promoted in my place was what someone in my office referred to as her bed-buddy. Hard work in the boardroom doesn't compete with what goes on in the bedroom."

No one really has a problem with anyone's sex life outside of work because then it is a private matter. The problem arises when the sex life of the people who not only work but 'sleep' together invades the workplace and causes problems for the "non-participants."

Sex in the workplace is disruptive. No one likes to feel that they have been overlooked for promotion or a new position simply because they weren't the ones "participating" in extracurricular activities with the man or woman in charge. Unfortunately, sex for power and sex for getting ahead will always be with us. 

Sex is sex and it has it's many wonderful  places. One of the places it shouldn't have is where you work. The problem is that no matter where you work, having sex with the right person in charge will always be a step up the work ladder for some people.  

***© 2009 all rights reserved Kristen Houghton The above articles may not be rewritten, copied, published, broadcast, or redistributed, wholly or in any part, without the express written permission of Kristen Houghton.

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