San Francisco’s 5 best tourist alterna-tractions

October 5, 8:49 PMSF Travel ExaminerEd Uyeshima

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View from Corona Heights (Photo: USGS)

If you face the familiar scenario of friends coming to San Francisco for the first time, you are probably like me and dread the idea of entering the Bermuda short-saturated tourist zones. Just as you’re ready to tell them to leave their hearts somewhere else like Omaha, for instance, here are five suggestions for the city's best "alterna-tractions", i.e., those alternative destinations that replicate the well-trodden tourist traps without the crowds and make you look like a knowledgeable, too-cool-for-souvenirs local.

BEEN THERE:  Twin Peaks

NOW TRY THIS:  Corona Heights

It only rises about 500 feet versus Twin Peaks’ lofty 922-foot elevation, but Corona Heights provides a superb view toward downtown which wraps comfortably around Twin Peaks. You can get there most easily from the street parking available at Roosevelt and Museum Way. Ideal for picnicking, Corona Heights offers a flat lawn area which sits just below the peak. Nearby are a great dog park and the Josephine D. Randall Museum, which features science, art, and interactive exhibits for kids primarily. The one drawback is that Corona Heights is completely open and offers no protection from the often gusty winds near the peak, not even behind the rocks. Also, keep in mind it’s not set up for tourists like Twin Peaks, and you should be respectful of the residents who live around the perimeter.

BEEN THERE:  Lombard Street between Hyde and Leavenworth Streets

NOW TRY THIS:  Vermont Street between 20th and 22nd Streets

Near McKinley Park is the truly most “crookedest” street in the city featuring a series of seven sharp turns ripe for Steve McQueen wannabes. A recent Travel Channel special measured the comparative sinuosity of both Lombard and Vermont and proved with a GPS that Vermont is indeed more "crooked”. Here’s the result: Vermont Street has a sinuosity of 1.56 versus 1.2 for Lombard Street. Sure, it’s not as postcard-pretty, but you can think of it as the blue-collar cousin of Lombard Street. Daredevils appreciate Vermont’s steeper and sharper switchbacks. There was a symbolic passing of the crooked street torch earlier this year when the Annual Bring Your Own Big Wheel race moved from Lombard to Vermont Street. At the very least, there is an interesting view of the back of the city.

A helmet view of the 2008 Bring Your Own Big Wheel race held on Vermont Street (Video: You Tube)

BEEN THERE:  Chinatown

NOW TRY THIS:  Clement Street in the Richmond District 

If all the restaurants and souvenir shops start to look the same on Grant Avenue, you owe yourself a trip out to the Richmond District to find more authentic Chinese flavors and atmosphere on Clement Street. Grocery stores like the Richmond May Wah Supermarket offer such verisimilitude with fresh Asian vegetables and noodles and the like. Much like the Miss Universe pageant, the variety of restaurants in the neighborhood take on a more global feeling with representation from not only China but also Burma, France, Indonesia, Ireland, Italy, Japan, Mexico, Russia, Vietnam, and the good old U.S.A. If you don’t have a car, you can get there pretty easily on the always-crowded 38 Geary MUNI bus line.

BEEN THERE:  Ferry Plaza Farmers’ Market

NOW TRY THIS:  Alemany Farmers’ Market

Diversity, both food-wise and people-wise, is what makes the Alemany Farmers’ Market a great place to shop for produce, flowers, eggs and baked goods on Saturday mornings. Established in 1947, this is San Francisco’s oldest farmers' market, and prices are comparatively cheaper than what you find at the Ferry Plaza Farmers Market. Moreover, there are affordable organic and non-organic options available here. They have a terrific selection of Southeast Asian vegetables. The downside is that the space is not especially conducive to pedestrian traffic, a limitation made clear when it gets very crowded. Parking can be tough, but the 23 Monterey and 67 Bernal Heights MUNI bus lines can take you there.

California Street cable car line looking eastward (Photo from visit-San-Francisco.com)

RODE THAT:  Powell Street Cable Car

NOW TRY THIS:  California Street Cable Car

There’s no way to avoid the tourists who squeeze themselves into the cable cars at Powell Street Plaza like Botox injections on Meg Ryan’s forehead…and bless them for spending their hard-earned currency on our fair city. However, if you want to avoid the long lines, try the California Street line instead. Starting next to the Hyatt Regency Hotel at Drumm and Market Streets, it runs an east-west route with a nice view of the Bay Bridge as you look back. The first five blocks are the least interesting since the car traverses the boring office buildings of the Financial District, but the sights get more interesting when the climb gets palpably more dramatic at Kearny Street.

Chinatown beckons at Grant Avenue, and then there is cable car central at Powell when this line crosses paths with its overstuffed, busier brother going in a north-south direction. Next up is Nob Hill with Grace Cathedral and a nice view toward the south. Then there is the downward journey to its surprisingly abrupt final destination at Van Ness Avenue. What I like most about this line is that you truly can hop and off the car like it was originally designed to accommodate. Conductors have more time to be personable, too. If you are determined to get to Fisherman's Wharf, my suggestion would be to take this line, get off on Polk and take the 19 MUNI line. You can then wait patiently for your friends on the Powell Street line as you nurse an Irish coffee at the Buena Vista Cafe.