The problem with positive thinking

November 3, 1:06 PMFaith & Culture ExaminerDr. Bob Beltz

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It's not easy being a Six!
photo from public domain

I have been trying to be a more positive person.  But I have a problem: I’m a “Six.”  Let me explain.  “Six” is a technical term referring to a particular personality type as described by a system called the Enneagram. The system is only a tool and some people love it and some thing it is a bunch of hooey.  When I first encountered it I was told it had been a tool that had been used in spiritual direction for centuries within the Catholic Church.  I was also told that it was a system that those who used it were never to reveal.  Supposedly, the fact that it found its way into the mainstream made some practitioners of the tool quite angry.  But this is not an article about the Enneagram.  I’m not enough of an expert on the subject to do much except tell you about what I discovered as a result of being exposed to it.  What I discovered is that I’m a Six. 

Six is one of nine personality types that form the primary structure of the system. The word “Enneagram” is derived from two Greek words that refer to a graphic that has nine sides.  Everyone theoretically can find their predominant operating characteristics in one of these nine types.  You are either a “One” or a “Two” or a ...you get the idea.  Each of the nine types can also have secondary traits that tie in with the other eight to a greater or lesser degree.  Discovering that I am a Six was very helpful for me.  It not only enabled me to understand some of my peculiar ways of thinking about life, it also helped me to realize for the first time that there are other people out there that are as nuts as I am.  In fact, there is a whole category of people out there like me: Sixes! 

Being a Six has resulted in a number of challenges that come with occupying this space on the Enneagram.    One challenge is the difficulty a Six has with the whole positive thinking concept.  Sixes tend to be troubleshooters who have an easier time seeing potential difficulties than positive possibilities.  Let’s put it this way; if Norman Vincent Peale had been a Six – there never would have been a “Power of Positive Thinking.”  His seminal work would more probably have been titled, “Watch Out: Something is Bound to Go Wrong.”  Don’t misunderstand me.  Sixes are not exactly pessimists.  They are far more complex than that.  Those who study and write about the nine types usually say that Sixes are the most complex and complicated of the nine types.  Not good news if you happen to be one!

I once heard Richard Rohr describe a Six as someone who does not see the half-full glass or the half-empty glass, but questions whether there is a glass there at all.  But as a Six I am not sure if Richard Rohr really knows what he is talking about.  Other characteristics include ambivalence toward others, which can be a good thing or a bad thing, and ambivalence toward themselves, which is usually not a great thing.  Trust me!   Because sixes “fluctuate” they can seem contradictory and puzzling.  Since we feel these things internally, we also tend to be the type out of the nine that struggle the most with anxiety.  I’m getting anxious just writing this article.  I’m not sure how I feel about this article.  Just kidding.  Not really. 

When you put all this together, you can see why the whole positive thinking thing is problematic for a Six.  And if you think positive thinking is problematic, it becomes very hard to try to muster it up. 

In an attempt to be a more positive thinking type of guy I even bought a CD of Norman Vincent Peale’s famous message on positive thinking.  At first I was really impressed.  Then I began to doubt that he was really as positive as he sounded on the CD.  See what I mean?  But I decided to listen to the CD every day on my way to work to try to become more positive.  I thought that maybe if I listened to it every day for a month some of it might sink in.  I made it through about two weeks and then just got mad that I couldn’t seem to be more positive.  I decided that it really didn’t work.  That made me mad.  Then I thought maybe it could work.  That made me hopeful.  Then I wondered what would happen if I didn’t get more positive in my thinking and that made me anxious.  When I got home I read my notes on being a Six and discovered that Sixes have “fluctuating emotional states.”  Great! 

As crazy as all this sounds, it was actually helpful to me to know that I was not crazy.  I’m just a Six.  What’s your excuse?  Sorry.  Anyway, I really did have times in my life where the way I thought about things made me nervous that something was wrong with me.  To know that there are tens of thousands of you out there that also might be Sixes gave me some comfort.  But the more I thought about it, the more troubled I became.  Think about it.  What if the President is a Six?  A Six can come across in public as if they are very confident.  I can do this sometimes.  Then they go back to their office and wonder if the world is going to end before the day is out.  Do you want this kind of person in charge of your country?  Or what if your personal physician ends up being a Six?  One day you come in for a visit and he smiles and tells you everything looks pretty good.  Then the next time he might express caution that all does not seem well.  If you find out he is a Six, which prognosis do you believe?  And if you’re a Six, you will be convinced that the worst-case scenario is the correct one.  And what if you see a shrink to get help with your “Sixness” and then discover he/she is Six?  Then you are really in trouble!

But there is hope.  I think.  The purpose of the Enneagram is not to diagnose your dysfunctions.  It is to help you identify the areas where you need spiritual growth.  Every type has its transformed and redeemed side.  A redeemed Six can be a good person to have around.  They see that the Emperor really doesn’t have any clothes on and can help give a reality check.  Of course the Emperor is probably an Eight, and Eights don’t like to be told they are buck naked.  This can result in serious problems for the Six.  When the positive thinking type guru tells you to drink the Kool-Aid, you need a Six around to say, “Hold on for just a minute there, partner!” 

Spiritual disciplines and prayer help Sixes become a bit more upbeat and stable.  When I began to get a handle on all this I began to pray, “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a Six!”  It’s a little variation on the Jesus prayer, but seems to help. 

I’m probably never going to be a gung-ho positive-type guy.  I will always have my ups and downs.  Stress pushes me toward the dark side of the Six type and prayer moves me toward the light.  You might not be a Six, but you are something.  It could be helpful to figure it out.  If you’re lucky, you won’t be a Six!