Choose Your Location
|
![]() |
9:40 Palin introduces her parents, who look barely older than she is. She then introduces her parents’ grandparents and her grandparents’ grandparents, the latter of whom are 82-year-old salmon fisherman.
9:42 “You know the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick,” Palin says, before applying a fresh coat of Max Factor shade 320 and lifting her leg to pee on the side of the stage.
9:46 “Here’s a little newsflash to the [media],” she goes on. “I’m not going to Washington to seek their good opinion. I’m going to Washington to serve the people of this great country.” I take this as a personal affront and cancel my Amazon.com Goodnight Moon order for her grandfetus.
The Sarah Palin drinking game!
When she says these words, drink.
Gay marriage: Flaming Dr Pepper
Anarchists: Irish Car Bomb
Melanoma: Pitcher of beer
Shotgun: Sip of beer
Shotgun wedding: Full game of century club
Fetus: 10 pitchers of Long Island Ice Tea
Tard: Hit off the crack pipe
Hippie double dutch


