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Ben Westhoff
Music ExaminerBen Westhoff is a national music examiner. He reviews music for the Village Voice, Pitchfork, NPR, and others. His
provocative personal blog has earned him
a devoted readership, and now he's here to rock y'all's worlds.
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Music Examiner
Republicans are insane
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
We all wish this weren't photoshopped
9:40 Palin introduces her parents, who look barely older than she is. She then introduces her parents’ grandparents and her grandparents’ grandparents, the latter of whom are 82-year-old salmon fisherman.
9:42 “You know the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull? Lipstick,” Palin says, before applying a fresh coat of Max Factor shade 320 and lifting her leg to pee on the side of the stage.
9:46 “Here’s a little newsflash to the [media],” she goes on. “I’m not going to Washington to seek their good opinion. I’m going to Washington to serve the people of this great country.” I take this as a personal affront and cancel my Amazon.com Goodnight Moon order for her grandfetus.
The Sarah Palin drinking game!
When she says these words, drink.
Gay marriage: Flaming Dr Pepper
Anarchists: Irish Car Bomb
Melanoma: Pitcher of beer
Shotgun: Sip of beer
Shotgun wedding: Full game of century club
Fetus: 10 pitchers of Long Island Ice Tea
Tard: Hit off the crack pipe
Hippie double dutch
More from Music Examiner
Just how terrible looking is Solange Knowles?
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
Women have been in the news a lot recently. Just today, John McCain announced that his vice presidential pick was Michael Palin's Alaskan neice.Over here at, um, whatever this non-blog is called, just yesterday we examined Fergie, the grotesque looking... Read More
Topics: Hip hop
Things I hate about the entertainment industry and beer
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
Recently I told you about things that I hate in writing, and now here are some things I hate about the entertainment industry and beer.1.Fergie.It might seem pretty obvious to hate the singer of "London Bridge" and "My Humps," but... Read More
Topics: Pop music
The naked women of Peta are not impressed with Jamie Lidell
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
I met the slightly unhinged, completely unshaven electronic music singer/producer Jamie Lidell at the Soho Grand Hotel not long ago. I was supposed to write about him for Harp magazine, but then Harp died, and so I ended up profiling him for Boston... Read More
Worst Press Release Ever: Lil Wayne
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
You know he'd like to touch your lovelylady lumps, so long as they're not cancerousI got my review copy of Lil Wayne's Tha Carter III in the mail recently and the CD's great, but the press release it came with is a train wreck. Keep in mind this was... Read More
Topics: Hip hop
Was rapper The Game a male stripper?
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
Almost certainly yes. When I asked the L.A. emcee (and rap's great post-Weezy hope) about long-persisting rumors that he used to flaunt his tootsies and his ding dong for bachelorette party ladies wearing (to borrow a joke from Todd Barry) chocolate... Read More
I was nearly fired for writing this
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
Here's a rundown of the most brain-busting, Man-sticking-it-to, pornograhpic, intellectually suspect, Digg-acumulating writings I've had published in the last week or so:1. Who is better, Built to Spill or Band of Horses? Glad you asked! I compare... Read More
Topics: Hip hop
The video Sarah Silverman doesn't want you to see
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
Fresh off her breakup with Jimmy Kimmel (Jesus I'm catty), last night Sarah Silverman did a surprise set at the Knitting Factory, as part of a show that also featured Variety Shac, the band Tigers and Monkeys, Jim Gaffigan and Todd Barry.I just happened... Read More
Topics: Alanis Morissette
Banned!
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
My hand has been turned, and I have been forced to take dramatic and unfortune action.As of this moment, commenter "are you serious...." is banned from ever reading or commenting on this column again.This is a permanent ban, although she is... Read More
Topics: Hip hop
Music to sniff coke off left-wing supermodels to
Ben Westhoff - Music Examiner
Where the Ben & Jerry's at?! Not since will.i.am's Songs About Girls have I heard an album as easy to hate as N.E.R.D.'s Seeing Sounds. Puketastic! This thing makes Trilla and Brooklyn's Don Diva look like Exile On Main Street.Pharrell Williams... Read More
Topics: Hip hop
