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You’ve summoned up your courage and started a conversation with an attractive woman You’re getting a friendly, open response. You’d like to continue the interaction, but it’s time to go. Do you ask for her number? Or, is it safer to give her your card and ask her to get in touch with you?
A lot of guys are opting for the latter. Some women appreciate this approach. Others, like Suzanne feel uncomfortable making the first call.
Dear Annie,
Over the last few weeks, several of the guys I have met have given me their cards or their number. Why do men give me their phone numbers instead of asking me for mine? If he’s really interested, why wouldn’t he call me?
Suzanne
Annie Replies:
He might be concerned that you won’t want to give out personal information, without having the opportunity to check him out first. Or perhaps, he’d prefer not to be rejected face-to-face. Women often rebuff men’s advances. A guy might decide that he’ll send out the message that he’s interested by giving you his card. If you call him, he feels able to move forward. If you don’t, it helps soften the blow of being turned down.
Try this the next time a guy gives you his card. If you want him to call you, look into his eyes and smile. Flirtatiously thank him for the card, and tell him that you’re looking forward to speaking to him. Let him know that you’re traditional when it comes to getting to know him, and ask him to call. Give him your phone number and a time when you’ll be available. He’ll understand that you want to get to know him better.
Instead of wondering why he wants to give you his card, the important thing to do is to let him know that you welcome his call. Giving him reassurance that his call is welcome is a great way to get started!
All names have been changed
Annie Gleason is the West Coast’s mid-life dating specialist. Her coaching practice is located in San Francisco.
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