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Ask Liz: replacing those deadly boilerplate resume phrases?

November 8, 9:53 PMWorkplace ExaminerLiz Ryan
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Dear Liz,

I want to replace the awful corporate boilerplate language in my resume, but I don't know how to to it. Can you please help those of us struggling with how to replace these?

Thanks,

Dan


Dear Dan,

There aren't any stock phrases to replace the boilerplate ones we're going to excise from our resumes. We want to be very specific about what we've done, and if we can talk about accomplishments that are especially relevant to the opportunity we're going after, all the better.

Let's think about the resume Summary. Here's a corporatespeak Summary:

"Results-oriented professional with a bottom-line orientation and twenty years of progressively more responsible experience in Finance and Accounting. Superior organizational and communication skills and experience leading cross-functional teams."

Yuck. Let's back up. Who(m) is this resume written for? It doesn't look as though it was written for anyone in particular. It's pure sludge. What sort of job are we going after? There are millions of different types of Finance and Accounting jobs. Our resume plan must start with our job-search direction - otherwise our resume isn't targeted to the audience we're pursuing!

Let's say we're going after Controller jobs in medium-sized manufacturing companies. We have lots of Cost Accounting and manufacturing stuff in our background, so we understand inventory turns, costed products, etc. Why do we like manufacturing so much? Here's why: Dad had a manufacturing company, and we worked there during summers through high school and college. Let's try that Summary again:


Since I helped out in the Accounting department of my dad's manufacturing business during high school, I've been drawn to manufacturing Accounting roles and the points of leverage that smart and nimble analysis can uncover. With six years of manufacturing Accounting for Caterpillar and a bent for spotting and exploiting cost-saving and revenue-boosting opportunities, I'm eager to help Eagle Manufacturing accelerate its growth in the Controller spot.


Notice that our job-seeker (we'll call him Jack) names the company and the job right in his Summary. Why not? He can tweak his resume every time he applies for a job. He's using a human voice in this Summary (the E-book "Put a Human Voice in Your Resume" is for sale on my site, www.asklizryan.com, if you're interested in that) and talking very specifically about what he's good at, without getting all abstract and lofty a la "I'm a strategic thinker and problem-solver yada yada yada." He's just saying, "Here's me, and this is what gets me up in the morning."

Thanks Dan!

Liz

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