When weddings attack!

When life gives you lemons, it makes a great wedding story--if you have a sense of humor and a little perspective.

Face it: crisis happens, and one could happen at your ceremony or celebration.   You can behave as if it's a dire catastrophe, or you can make it an opportunity to grow, find your strengths, and creatively adapt.   This is especially true with weddings: are you going to enjoy whatever comes and make the best of it, or have yourself a big fat drama if something doesn’t go according to plan? 

Adverse circumstances do not mandate a Bridezilla or Groomzilla response, despite TV myth-building to the contrary; choose a positive attitude when trouble comes, and everything will be okay a lot faster.

This CNN article about wedding day mishaps illustrates how unexpected twists can make your wedding better than you ever imagined--for example, when the electricity goes out at the reception, improvised candlelight can make things very romantic and groovy indeed.  Will you relax and get cozy, or pitch a wobbly that REALLY ruins the evening?    

We only gain the gifts of crisis when we are willing to discard our notions of complete control, roll with new circumstances, and (when all else fails) be a good sport.  Since I’m a big believer in “as the wedding, so the marriage,” I see the ability to be flexible, accepting, and gracious under less-than-ideal wedding circumstances as a good indication of a healthy future.  Your marriage starts with your wedding day, so--just as you should throughout your lives together--give your best when disaster strikes, and be grateful for the parts that go well.  Your guests and your new spouse will admire your spirit and you’ll ultimately be glad you didn’t behave badly.  

Yes, accidents happen but they bring us gifts, so hearken to the metaphor of the groovy candlelight wedding: when things go dark, lighten up (but be a little careful with that cake knife, please.)

Until next time, a sweet and long life to you all.

Elizabeth Oakes welcomes your feedback and ideas at weddingexaminer@gmail.com.