How to Wear Shorts

August 5, 12:49 PMMen's Style ExaminerStile E. Coyote

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Do it up right. Just not at the office.

There has been a lot of talk lately about wearing shorts to the corporate office. Put it this way, you should not. No matter who says otherwise. Now, there's something to be said for those who work in slightly different environments. If you're signing a deal in Dubai on behalf of your company, shorts, you can imagine, are right out. Full stop.

However, if you're developing a new video game from an ill-lit web 2.0 company where your hours are more suitable for vampires than humans, go for it. Chances are you're the not ones reading this column anyway.

The trouble with wearing shorts to the office is that very few people can make it look good.

For the rest of us, the trouble with wearing shorts to the office is that very few people can make it look good. Sure there are some who can pull it off, but as a rule, most can't. So why do it? There's also a level of unspoken tradition associated with corporate culture that is the glue in many offices: How we address our superiors, the proper channels of communication, and our attire are some of the traditions worth keeping. It's like not attacking the yellow jersey in the Tour de France on the last day. There's no rule that states this. It's just understood.

However, you are able to (and should) pull off shorts for the weekend, a casual night, or other times. You can wear your shorts with the safe option (polos), with a T-shirt (less stylish, but worth exploring), with dress shirts (right), and you can even wear a blazer with your shorts.

I'm not sure where this lackadaisical thought process happened. Was it after we collectively as a country went to Bermuda and thought, "Hmm, this is a good idea!"? Maybe it was when Japan started ditching ties as to cool employees down rather than foot the bill (and emissions) for more A/C in their Cool Biz move starting in 2005. All I know is that even casual Fridays shouldn't mean shorts are acceptable. BBQ at your boss's house? Nope, not even then.

Here are some style rules men should follow when about to show some skin:
- Don't wear shorts to the office
- Shorts should fit like your trousers
- Shorts look best with polo shirts.
- Classic sneakers are better than athletic shoes
- Tuck in your dress shirt
- The belt rule still applies
- Boat shoes work best with Madras, sans socks
- Loafers are fine, too. sans socks
- Shorts should be anywhere from 1" to 3" above the knee (If you look like either John Stockton or a clam-digger, adjust your fit)