Tips for helping a homesick spouse

February 13, 12:02 AMSeattle Early Marriage ExaminerLacey Kern

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Photo I took on my engagement day

For those of us who grew up in the Seattle area, loving it usually comes naturally. Really, who couldn’t love the stunning mountain views, the proximity to every kind of recreation, the world-renowned landmarks like the Space Needle, and trees aplenty? In June of 2007 I married my husband Derek, a native of southern California. While he loves everything there is to love about Washington, though, it’s forever lacking in one major way: none of his friends or family are here. So, I’ve devised some ways to combat his homesickness. Those of you in similar situations can put these techniques to use, and probably come up with a number of your own, but here are my top five:

1. Eat Out – while Lucille’s BBQ and In-n-Out Burger don’t exist here in Seattle, we do have Famous Dave’s and Dick’s Drive-In, and in a pinch they suffice to stave off my husband’s homesickness. Is your wife from South Florida? Try taking her out to a Cuban restaurant for dinner, such as Mojito Cafe on Western Avenue.
2. Distract – to remind him why he once loved it here, I take him to see the sights – trips to Pike Place Market, ferry rides, and drives to Leavenworth. What does your spouse enjoy about Seattle? Remind him or her of it.
3. Secret Shopping – is there a food or beverage that your spouse could only get in their home state (or country)? Find a place that sells it, at a local store or online, and surprise him or her with it. For my man, it’s Arizona Iced Tea’s cans of Arnold Palmer – whenever I find it, I pick up a few.
4. Skype – talking on the phone is nice, but the wonders of technology enable so much more. Skype allows you to video chat in real time for free with your loved ones wherever they are, as long as you both have webcams – take advantage of it!
5. Make New Friends – if you grew up here like me, you may have an abundance of friends and family and your spouse may feel like an outsider. Making a point of forging new friendships as a couple will put you both on a level playing field and might ease your spouse’s loneliness. Making friends as a couple can also be less intimidating than making a friend on your own.