www.free-clipart.net 

Don't say you're cleaning a carpet or giving away laundry soap to get in the door.  We both know you're selling an overpriced vacuum cleaner.  A person could buy a new, perfectly acceptable vacuum once a year during the lifespan of your product, even if yours is somehow superior, and still spend less.

Also, don't call about previewing a new product for a free vacation.  (See above.)

Put away the laminated 1,000,000x magnification pictures of bedbugs and dust mites.  That's why they're small, so we don't have to look at them.  Out of sight, out of mind.

Yeah, your vacuum picks up stuff my vacuum left, but my vacuum would pick up stuff your vacuum left, too.  Especially if you change my settings back to where they belong.

You won't win any points describing the house's unsanitary condition, unless you include a guided tour of your immaculate house.

When you call your supervisor to authorize a super-spectacular price, everybody knows he's just shooting the breeze, if he's even there.  We've all seen that trick at the car dealer.

In fact, just go away.  People who close the door or hang up the phone are probably doing you a favor, since your company doesn't pay the commissions it initially promised, anyway.

Sincerely,

The Scam Examiner